Monochrome

yes this includes leaving notes on the cars of strangers who look “too healthy” to be in the disabled spots. we hate you!

yes this includes yelling at strangers who walk out of disabled spots. we hate you!

yes this includes yelling at strangers who use their legs while in a wheelchair. we hate you!

yes this includes accusing a wheelchair user of faking because you saw them walking the other day. we hate you!

yes this includes trying to “disprove” disabled strangers on the internet. we hate you!

yes this includes telling someone they are too young to be disabled or use a mobility aid. we hate you!

yes this includes telling someone that someone else has it worse and that they should suck it up. we hate you!

yes this includes telling someone that they must be lying about their symptoms. we hate you!

yes this includes telling a stranger they should save mobility aids for people who “really” need them. we hate you!

yes this includes telling strangers that they are wasting disability resources. we hate you!

yes this includes telling someone they do not act disabled enough. we hate you!

yes this includes telling someone that they are too happy/good looking/etc to be disabled. we hate you!

You say “glad to know we’re on the same page.” Slowly, he will have to adapt to just outright telling you what he thinks instead of playing mind games.

When your friend tries to hint that they’re mad at you without saying anything: “Oh, I’m fine, clearly you don’t need to worry about me,”

You say: “I’m glad you’re doing well. Call me if you want to talk, though!” Soon enough, they will accept that they can’t be passive aggressive with you.

When your boyfriend says: “All your friends are great, I really love *insert male friend* especially.”

You say: “I’m so glad you like my friends! I should invite them back soon.” He needs to understand that if he has a problem with your friends, he needs to just voice his concerns instead of being sarcastic and accusatory.

As someone who has lived through several toxic relationships and has an abusive father, I think one of the most important manipulation tools a toxic person has is excessive subtext and hidden meanings in their conversation. It hides all of the actual fighting from the eyes of onlookers while still hurting you, which is scary and makes you feel like you’re making it all up. Don’t put up with this bs. Make them stop hiding.

kids and teens are allowed to be angry without having that anger dismissed as a “tantrum” or “hormones”. they’re allowed to be angry with adults, including their parents and teachers, without being dismissed as “disrespectful”.

they’re allowed to be sad without being dismissed as being “moody” or “whiny”. they’re allowed to feel resentment without being dismissed as “ungrateful”. they’re allowed to be uncomfortable without being dismissed as “oversensitive”.

they’re allowed to feel restless without being dismissed as “badly behaved”. they’re allowed to feel lonely without being dismissed as “attention-seeking”. they’re allowed to be tired without being dismissed as “lazy”.

some but not all cool things nobody ever thinks of:

put hand sanitizer or a sink in the accessible bathroom stall, or alcohol wipes outside of it. people who cannot use their legs have to use unwashed hands to roll to the sink, and people who can use their legs are afraid to walk out of stalls because they get harassed and even assaulted.

enough space for wheelchair in doorway…AND ARMS. HOW DO YOU THINK THE WHEELCHAIR MOVES! if I cannot roll through it without scraping my arms it is not accessible

brick paths suck the end

gravel paths suck. make it smooth

a ramp is not accessible if it is too steep. not every wheelchair user is ripped enough or capable of using muscles enough to propel themselves up a steep angle safely. some wheelchair users have heart issues. you want heart attacks? this is how you get them

perfect 90 degree turns suck and are often impossible to turn through

some wheelchairs have foot rests. account for them

wheelchair accessible means wheelchair accessible while alone. if you expect someone to have to be helped out to use your facility, that is not acceptable or accessible