What am I doing with my life?

“this character did not act in the most objectively logical way possible!” is not ! actually valid literary criticism

it’s actually wild how terrified of the general public most usamericans are. like you don’t realize it if you’re someone who mostly walks and takes transit and spends a lot of time in populous public spaces but then you talk to one of the thousands of people that seemingly never set foot in any public space besides a parking garage or a starbucks and you suddenly understand why it’s so easy for fascist rhetoric about the dangerous alien to take root. this country’s median voter pretty much never interacts with strangers who aren’t their coworkers or people they met on dating apps

saw a post on instagram that was literally someone citing statistics saying public transit is one of the safest travel options out there and the comments were literally just “ummmmm op this is so ableist and misogynistic of you :) don’t you know the average public transit user is a dangerous violent criminal who wants to set you on fire :)))”

it must be so terrifying and sad to go through life convinced if you set foot outside your car in public or interact with people outside your nuclear family you’ll instantly be raped and robbed by the Evil Poors no wonder so many of these people are reactionary tar pits

Didn't realize they made emergency thermal blankets for babies

This was wild because I forgot your high schoolers are called seniors and I thought you were talking about old folks

“it was their second to last day”

For more information search for "Star Trek Rule 34"

dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats

a guy shoots at me with a sniper rifle and I catch the bullet in my teeth and eat it, but he saw that coming and put poison in the bullet, but I saw that coming and drank an antidote ahead of time, but all those weird chemicals still give me a really bad kidney stone a few days later and I pass out from pain and crash my car into, by pure coincidence, the sniper

my friend's puppy has baffling levels of attitude for someone who's only been around for a handful of months. he understands concepts like deceit and civil disobedience and other things i didn't fully grasp until well into my 20s. this guy doesn't even know the seasons loop yet. he's probably like okay spring. what's next. some other new bullshit i bet

My gf loves playing with my dick in bed because it's "like a little fidget toy"

Normal sized fidget toy

this is so rampant among horse people it's wild. i rode a mare all my life and she was the gentlest, kindest soul i've ever met in any animal. yet the way every other rider i worked with, including women, would make assumptions and disparage her like 'oh you couldn't pay me to ride a mare' because they're supposedly difficult, unpredictable, and mean. it's crazy to listen to people talk about a horse the same way men talk about their 'crazy exes' in 90s sitcoms and that is not an exaggeration.

birds are so privileged for being able to sit on top of street lamps and judge people. i wish i was up there