no clue what I'm doing since before the ballpit

common advice for social anxiety is to tell yourself "people aren't going to think less of you just because you said something a bit daft" but the thing is. sometimes they will. and you just have to learn to be cool with that and to treat it as a dnd random encounter rather than letting it ruin your whole day

i have a Persian agenda where i encourage every man i know to grow the longest and prettiest hair possible

personal agenda. Personal.

i’m speechless. there’s a guy for everything.

was at a bar and a 50+ year old drunk white woman complimented me and my friend's outfits, told us there was a campsite up in northern maryland where a lot of gay bears go to have sex in the woods. we asked her how she knew about this and she very aggressively said "because i'm a FAG HAG!!! but i'm not allowed to say that anymore I GUESS!!!"

31 hours deep into the insomniac’s gambit and i tried to microwave a popsicle

31 hours deep into the insomniac’s gambit and i posted on the wrong blog again

i thought those were horse hooves

Lil Wayne….

erika kirk being handed the golden opportunity to be the face of conservatives for the rest of her life and then fumbling it instantly by being genuinely unlikable and off-putting will always be funny to me almost as funny as remembering that charlie kirk got shot in the neck and died

@punsbulletsandpointythings