𝐃𝐄 𝐋𝐀 𝐋𝐔𝐍𝐀.

man, kids out there can only hope to be as cool as you when they grow up. you're really out here with the whole silver fox look that i bet drives the ladies insane and an insane amount of talent. hell, you're not that much older than me and still i hope to be oscar fucking isaac when i grow up. how are you doing, my guy? [ @oscarihe ]

yeah, yeah. you're too kind. my boys are slowly but surely entering that phase where dad is becoming less cool, so i'm trying to enjoy my remaining time at the top. but since it's coming from hollywood's hearthrob, i'll just say thank you and that i appreciate it. it's really good to hear from you, man, it's been awhile. i'm doing pretty good, you know: working on things that keep me in the city, so i've been enjoying getting time with my people here. how've you been? what's the latest?

i saw somewhere that you went to juilliard. there was a small point in time before the child star thing fully kicked in where i had that school circled on my dream list. i think it was mostly just me wanting to go to new york but as i got older, i understood the lore more. they must be so very proud to have you as an alum. do you go back for any events? @oscarihe

i did, i did! actually, i was lucky enough to go back in may and receive an honorary doctorate from them, which was such a privilege... and that's with me being an old man, so it's never too late! granted, i know you're busy taking the world by storm, but if you ever catch a break and are interested, let me know and i'll see if i can do something. not that you'd need the edge.

so what you're really telling me here is that i shouldn't have taken it to the meeting? good news: i survived. god, you're a lifesaver but i obviously knew i could count on you. how about next weekend? i'm currently visiting a friend... and his friends. but enough about me and my soon-to-be former car, how are you?

you drove it? isabela... me va a dar un patatús. you're going to kill me one day, i swear to god. of course i'll come fix it this weekend, but only after a well-earned lecture. and after i get answers about this trip? forget spidey-senses, my dad instincts are kicking in, so let's skip me for now.

text message ⇒ papito

PRIVATE: Hold on, what do you mean? Are you catching real feelings for her? Or is there a reason why it's going further than intended?

PRIVATE: more like... we found "alternative ways" to vent our frustrations with each other. shit, i don't know, em; i've known her for forever and things have always been a bit, or actually extremely, shaky between us. we can't stand each other, you know? and then, all the while, i have this whole other thing going on that i can't make sense of...

how well do you know cars? and more importantly, how many red lights on the dashboard are not supposed to be lit up? also, if it starts making a click click click sound from the engine, is that a sign that i should take it to a mechanic? i'm asking because i was getting ready to go see my agent, and now i'm not convinced my car won't spontaneously catch fire on the way there. ( @oscarihe )

i wouldn't call myself an expert by any stretch of the imagine, but i'd say i'm advanced amateur enough to tell you that that's a deathtrap waiting to happen. please don't bring it to the mechanic; have someone tow it. that or if you're around the city, i can swing by and take a look, but again: just a slightly advanced amateur here.

For you? I have all the time in the world. So, go on, tell me what's been in that head of yours lately.

PRIVATE: way too much, em. this thing with carey went a little further than the pr stint it was supposed to be.

sounds like a pretty solid crew to me. unfortunate that bobby couldn't come back but i'm sure finneas did just as good. i'll have to jump into the second season to see for myself. don't worry, my lips are sealed and steven will never know you just complimented his work. what are you working on now that you're done with beef?

yeah, finneas was incredible. one of the foundations for any story is its music, and he brought so much heart and soul in every single piece. i can't wait for you to check it out; you'll have to let me know what you think. ahh, wrapping up voice work for beyond the spider-verse, getting started on the production for the roman... praying for a solid sleep somewhere in there, eventually. what about you, man? what're you up to lately?

are they anything like mine and not impressed with anything you do? workwise, at least. for some reason she thinks my dad jokes are funny, so i'm winning in that way but losing in others. i posted a picture not long about that whole 67 thing - that i will never understand - and she actually congratulated me on being 'one of the cool dads'. how is mentioning 67 cool? i don't get it.

well, my six year-old, mads, is still convinced i'm the coolest guy on the planet, which does wonders for both my heart and my ego. balancing that out, though, is my nine year-old,eugene. he's very quickly approaching that not impressed stage with me. i'll have him with me on a set or he'll be standing off to the side during an interview, and i can see the "you better not embarrass me, dad" written across his face. but i did get a pretty big win recently! when i was up on stage for the juilliard doctorate, i snuck in a little 6-7 hand motion for the boys and they both thought it was the greatest thing i'd ever done. feeling on top of the world right now.