Opera-tional

Countries like Korea and India which have a high garlic use in their local recipes don’t report anything remotely resembling vampires in their ancient stories. Hence indicating that Europe’s vampires might be real.

do you ever get stuck in between “it’s ok not to have everything on track i got time” and “i’ve already wasted my life at the ripe old age of 23”

Oh god. I'm 33.

If Goldilocks tried three beds, then Momma Bear and Daddy Bear slept separately. Baby Bear is probably the only thing keeping the family together.

You ain’t have to put those people business out like that.

Y’know, the story straight-up tells us why Mama Bear and Papa Bear sleep in separate beds: they have very different needs in terms of mattress firmness, and those fancy responsive mattresses that can be soft on one half and firm on the other hadn’t been invented yet. There’s no shame in valuing your spinal health.

The fact that they’re secure enough to admit that they’re better off in separate beds probably indicates that they have a very healthy relationship built on a foundation of mutual love and respect. 

their relationship was just right

boyfriend boobs travel

Butter, sex, wine. Maybe not in that order.

The ‘back’ in horseback riding is probably unnecessary.

He's no monster. He washes his hands.

discover you’re related to someone at the worst possible moment

Are we talking Ring Cycle? Can't remember which one though... Siegfried if I had to guess.

tell a story to a group of bar patrons

I love this account! Is it Offenbach?