OiBoiBabyBoy

the son

and the holy spirit

For ethical and queer rep reasons but ALSO because this means Shane can and potentially would just body people even off ice. Incredible. Ilya would instantly come in his pants and so would I.

Imagine Ilya gets a little Too Much. Like he’s just running his mouth so much or trying to fight someone especially out in public and Shane just…picks him up and slings him over his shoulder real casual. “Bye guys sorry about my husband.”

They’re doing the push pull thing they do as foreplay and instead of just getting back with a “fuck you” like usual Shane decides to pick him up off the ground and pin him again a wall. Just to see what will happen. And what happens is Ilya brain leaks out of his ears.

And then the next thing he knows he’s been slammed into the wall, feet barely touching the ground, something metal and sharp pushing against the side of side throat. And then he’s just staring at Shane who’s staring back at him in shock, and it turns out it was just keys but like holy shit Shane were you going to shove your key through someone’s carotid artery??

And Shane’s like I’m so sorry! I thought you were a burglar! What are you doing here??

And Ilya’s like I came to surprise you Jesus Christ RIP to any burglar who tries to break into your place.

But Shane’s still kind of got him up against the wall and when he goes to let Ilya loose they realize Ilya’s like super hard and he has an Idea.

What's your blog title from?

What movie have you watched most recently? What did you think of it?

what are you looking forward to right now?

if you could do anything at all today, what would it be?

What's your drink of choice? (Coffee/tea order, alcohol of choice, pop, etc)

What's your hair routine like? Anything special?

what's your favorite way to travel? Is there a mode of travel you haven't done that you want to experience?

favorite month of the year and why?

favorite time of day and why?

do you play or follow any sports? & elaborate on that?

what kind of music is stuck in your head a lot lately?

dishes or laundry?

what's something you learned recently?

if you could give a TED talk on anything, what would you talk about?

What's a piece of advice you find yourself giving a lot?

what's a piece of advice you would give to yourself five years ago?

do you believe in luck and superstition? Do you carry any lucky items or follow any lucky rules?

Are you musical? Play any instruments or sing? Would you ever perform for an audience?

Write, type, or speak?

Accidental sex

“Anything you can do I can do better INCLUDING THAT” sex

“You played a prank on me and now I’m going to play one on you except oops this accidentally got hot” sex

“You made an inaccurate assumption about *insert sexual or sexuality misnomer here* and I’m going to teach you the truth” sex

“You think you’re so smart so I’m going to teach you a lesson” sex

“Do you think I look good/hot/provocative in this? Wait is this turning you on???” sex

“You don’t know what *insert kink here* is and I’m really bad at explaining things and now we’re doing it oops” sex

“I bet I can dance/move/act like that and I don’t even have to be a dancer/stripper/actor/whatever wait are you turned on?” sex

“I lost a bet to you and the circumstances were supposed to be a joke but I took them seriously” sex

“You were joking about something and I took you seriously” sex

“You seem to think that __ won’t feel good and I intend to prove you wrong” sex

“You’re intentionally getting under my skin so I threaten to spank you/playfully spank you and now you look like you just got banged against a wall” sex

“I didn’t know you were a sub and when I called you a good boy/girl you almost cried” sex

“I didn’t know you were a dom and when I called you Sir/Ma'am you almost jumped me” sex

“Playing a prank on our freinds to make them think we’re a couple and now we’re in bed together” sex

“I’m fixing you *insert appliance/furniture/house thing hee* for you and now I’m sweaty and half naked and you’re drooling” sex

“I noticed the way you were watching me eat this popsicle so I purposely started making it an inuendo and now we’re both hot and bothered” sex

“Haha that thing they do in movies/porn/online is so corny like no way that’s actually hot haha oops it is” sex

“Freinds can totally watch porn together and nothing can happen…. no they can’t” sex

“I showed you *insert sexual thing here* as a joke but you’re actually turned on” sex

“You found my sex toys and I teasingly offered to demonstrate them welp here we are” sex

“I started pretending to dirty talk to you an hour ago and it stopped being pretending 58 minutes ago” sex

“All I’m saying is that I’ve been told I’m a good lay, wanna find out?” sex

“You said you don’t like __ but I bet the people you were with just don’t know how to do it, I, however, have experience and bet I could make you like it” sex

“We platonically slept together last night because of circumstances and we both woke up horny” sex

“This started as a tickle fight and it isn’t tickling anymore” sex

“We’re just bros being bros and doing something 100% platonic but somehow we’re turning eachother on because of not-so-burried feelings for eachother and we can’t make it stop” sex

But to prove that it wasn't a fluke, they continued to have the best ideas for every aspect of it. How does he transform? A cool watch you can also sell as a toy. That watch's name? Omnitrix. Say it. It's so satisfying. How many aliens? Ten. Nice round number. The kid's name? Ben. The show's name? Ben Ten. His full name is Benjamin Tennyson, a normal, plausible name, but he also turns into 10 aliens.

Bigger brands dream about this synergy. Better writers would kill for this coherence. So holistic. So intuitive. The identity alone!!! The retro alien sound motif? Chilling. The green? Any other color would be wrong. The kirby krackle pattern? It seems so obvious in retrospect. The roadtrip format? Genius. Lesser writers would've done the spider-man high school thing. His arch nemesis being Cthulhu darth vader? Inspired, iconic, intimidating!