Untitled Blorbo tumblr

silly answer. i am a river isn't a bad cook defender.... we don't Know he burned the chicken..... so quick to judge maybe it WAS just searing. serious version of this answer. i do seriously think he's not a bad cook! i also think he doesn't do it that often. for several reasons. by the rule of comedy it's funny for him to eat a tin of beans with a fork. but also it ties in w/ my headcanon abt his view of 'home' being specifically david's house - and its true that whenever the show needs to send him home per se they show him there - and he just doesn't really consider his flat in london as home. hence the river is surviving on canned food exclusively and only owns a mattress on the floor headcanon can coexist with my he CAN cook actually headcanon. none of this has a basis in canon i just like thinking about it.

I recently learned an old French euphemism for bisexuality. It means to be powered "by sail and steam," and it absolutely comes from a specific flavor of 19th-century ship.

HMS Terror and Erebus were bisexual, you heard it here first.

who tf would say that??? (bolded those currently in office)

YAYYY YIPPEE IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED

so first i have to establish that like half of the men on the show engage with river in a psychosexual way. like spider, duffy, and hobbs all individually make comments and act in ways that’s aggressively sexual to river. i’m not even saying that in a shipping way it’s just interesting. i don’t know where im going with this but what about river makes every man who hates him in a 300 mile radius want to beat him up while also being weirdly sexual about it? those moments are often played for laughs (especially hobbs in s3) and don’t often have the same undercurrent of danger that frank’s actions do. and i think the show did a really great balance of that because they ran the risk of coming across as either making attraction between men the butt of the joke or excusing male sexual violence as a joke and they did neither (imo)!! which often in media i see both are fumbled intensely. instead they use this expectation as a way to separate frank to mark his horrific nature. his actions towards his sons aren’t humorous in the same way spider/duffy/hobbs are

ALSO i realized as i was typing; often when media does stuff like this (making sexual comments at a characters expense without intending it to have Heavy Meaning) it often mocks the person receiving the comments. i think slow horses is different because a lot of the time it’s clear that spider/duffy/hobbs are making out of pocket comments/behaviors and river isn’t the one mocked for this. we’re aligned with river in that moment of ???lmao??? instead of laughing at river. it helps that all three of these characters are antagonistic towards the characters we want to root for, but aren’t as dangerous as frank. that minimal level of power they sit at, both internal to the narrative and external, allows us to laugh AT THEM in those moments instead of at river. frank, however, has intense power internally and externally to the narrative (as he is one of the main villains of the show, and river has not been able to outsmart him). when he does psychosexual stuff towards river, instead of having that same humor we are like oh my god what the fuck. there’s a lot more worry for river and fear of what frank is capable of, and the incest adds to that level of horror. the way he acts towards his sons establishes this level of ohhh this is different and worrying. tldr narratively important incest?

i didnt hear what you said

hold on i need to blow my nose

wow

i feel kind of nauseous

is this anything

i don't know

this kind of reminds me of that one song

we can probably ignore that noise if you want to

why is my sock wet

it smells bad in here

that was weird

where are my glasses

ow

this is normal

sorry

just 2 chill people chilling

this is cool

can you say that again

are we good