Untitled Blorbo tumblr

slow horses experience is just watching lamb try and fail not to get unhealthily attached to his defective reactive hoop-jumping monkey he was forced to accept, get angry at the captive monkey for its continued neurotic obsession with performing despite its previous attempts to do so landing it in a kill shelter, get angry at himself for bonding with the monkey and thus not being able to fully commit himself to letting it go, and then get even angrier at others when they don’t respect that even if it lights shit on fire half the time trying to do tricks, it is still his fucking monkey and they have no right to infringe upon his personal circus. also my friends shirley and louisa are there :)

he likes having his autonomy violated and his boundaries overruled it's literally good for him. he likes being given a meaningful task within pre-defined constraints that he absolutely must do Or Else. and he likes being packed up and kept in a box. send post.

River Cartwright’s awfully pretty but Apple’s gonna have to work harder to get me shipping him with anyone; I’m too busy losing my mind over Obnoxious Bastard Pensioner and Codependent Alcoholic Pensioner, which is not the dynamic I’m certain the writers wanted me to fixate on.

oh GOD I just got to the point of the s2 finale where Lamb tells Big Russian Villain he wants their Showdown (tm) to take place outside his office because he doesn't want Catherine to go through finding another corpse of another boss after he killed her last one/boyfriend I am chewing my leg off and throwing it at the writers

you need to understand that i have two sets of headcanons. there's the set of realistic headcanons based on my genuine reading of the show, and then there's me playing pretend with my dolls.

The way she’s thirstier for Rebecca than she is for Roy and Jamie combined.