I want Lil Nas X to do a cover of Santa Baby. Heād make it as suggestive as Eartha Kitt intended

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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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noise dept.
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@ohboy-herewegoagain
I want Lil Nas X to do a cover of Santa Baby. Heād make it as suggestive as Eartha Kitt intended

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Top ten vanity plates ever spottedā¦.no question
i dunno i feel like it's more complicated than that
THEIR REACTIONS ARE SO GREAT THIS IS THE BEST PRANK
"what did you think you were here for?"
I want all animals to become sapient enough to produce art specifically because I want to see what sort of sex homunculus caricature each species would create if given the ability to draw
Like we've already got the anime waifu with the needle-waist and watermelon-bazonkas and borzoi-legs and bug-eyes. Now show me a fucked-up stupid beetle as drawn by a horny beetle. I want to see what a cartoonishly sexy lion looks like according to lions. I want to see the most ridiculous drawing of a peahen that would have the peacocks squaring up by the fountain.
We give this power to ostriches and they just start drawing people
You can actually see the bug version in some orchids. The orchid takes the bug's idea of "sexy" and makes a flower that attracts the males better than the actual female.
(Picture from the paper "Pollinators as Isolation Mechanisms: Field Observations and Field Experiments regarding specificity of pollinator attraction in the genus Ophrys" by Paulus (2018))
orchids as the waifu pillows of the insect world
Looking back on 2020, I think it's hilarious that Wellerman of all shanties is the one that blew up online. It's not a song about life on the high seas or adventuring
It's the "Where the fuck is my delivery" song

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itās never a normal temperature anymore itās always some fucking bullshit
i like a trans headcanon as much as the next guy but sometimes it really boils down to āthat character has not had enough agency and/or introspective freedom in their life to have transitioned by the time we meet them in their storyā
making some gay mac n cheese because it's pride month and i haven't eaten in 14 hours
we're using the cheetos box of bones bold and cheesy mac'n cheese, cause what's gayer than that
limited edition, i might add
here's the cheese powder all separated out. i used a chopstick and immediately regretted it but here we are
hell yeah. boil those gay little skeletons
alr pasta is done. now the hard part
gotta take 1/6 of this cheese powder and 1/6 of the pasta... wish me luck
first color: yellow (it's the lightest)
and what a color... beautiful
orange (it's oranger than it looks. i only added like 1 drop of red food dye bc the cheeto dust is so strong)
well this was a nightmare. pretend this red isn't the color of coagulated blood
green. if anyone cares.
horrifying!
blue.... oh no
this may have been a mistake
purple. purple like the risk pieces
that was the last color aaaagghhgh why did i do this
all the colors together...
awful. horrible. i feel so accomplished
holy shit you guys. it looks so good i
!!!!
ok but this lighting brings out the color so well
HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!!!!
it's not very good mac n cheese actually
NO NOT MY GAY MAC N CHEESE
Dutch artist, Redmer Hoekstra.
Ooooh, becauseĀ āpathā andĀ ātoadā are written and pronounced the same way in Dutch!
Pad en pad.
Een paddenpaadje.
A road of toads.
I trode on the toad road

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the next few seconds WRAPPED
You clicked 1 readmore
Twin boys
wire son and cloth son
okay more serious version of my other post about this but the fact that arachnophobia modes that censor spiders are the video game accessibility settings things that have become widespread instead of other accessibility settings perplexes me so much. like if you can remove spiders from your game but not things like flashing lights or effects that cause motion sickness i think you might need to reconsider your priorities
As per my last clay tablet,
CCing Ibbi-Ilabrat on this one just to make sure weāre all on the same page!
āThe sesame is visibly dyingā makes me lose it every time. My sesame #mysesame
I did some investigating since comments on this post are saying āItās real, itās just the wrong imageā.
So far I have found two sources, here and here. Do you notice anything in common about these two? Both of these only have one citation, which is the twitter/x account @/TheAncientWorld. I donāt have an account on X, so if anyone wants to do further digging for me it would be appreciated, but it appears that the original post has been deleted.
The first source I found, from thewhippet.org, acknowledges that the image shown in the post is actually a map of irrigation systems. They provide this image instead, along with the translation (I canāt personally verify whether the translation is accurate):
I have zero idea where these images are sourced from, besides the @/TheAncientWorld twitter account. Reverse image searching both of these yielded no results that I know of. Then again, I didnāt feel like paying any service to have access to ādeepā searches, so if anyone has more reliable ways of finding image sources I would gladly accept the help.
All in all, I canāt really say for certain if I think itās real, but itās not looking great. And, if Iām being honest, Iām mostly doing this not because Iām personally invested in knowing if itās actually real, but because itās annoying and stupid that people in the notes are saying itās real because one singular person provided one of the sources I listed above.
So really this is all to give people a reminder: an article, newsletter, blog, etc. is not automatically a reliable source on account of existing. Sources need sources.
The text is real! Yay!
I looked up āYale Babylonian Collection 5471ā. The Yale site itself is down at the moment, but I was able to find it in Archibab, the Old Babylonian archive.
https://archibab.fr/texte/15185
ā(1) Speak to my lord: (2) Thus says Sin-gamil. (4) May (3) Å amaÅ” and Marduk (4) keep you in good health (3) forever for my sake! (5) Concerning the workmen who you wrote about, (6) on the day that I saw your tablet, (8) I made (7) Awil-ili (8) ready and (10) he set out (9) on the journey at night. (11) As to the sesame field, (13) I am not getting water (12) from Sin-id-dinamās hands; (14) the sesame will die. (15) Do not say āYou did not write meā! (16) The sesame is ⦠to see; (17) Ibbi-Ilabrat saw it; (18) that sesame will die. (19) I have written to you (now), (let me hear) what you say. (20) And perhaps (22) I did not ask for (20) the plough-⦠(21) of MaÅ”atanum, (23) but send me the handles.ā
(and yes the image in the original tweet is of a different tablet showing irrigation systems)

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tired of cannibalism as a metaphor for love or sex. can we get into cannibalism as a metaphor for colonization.
1. Europeans using Egyptian mummies as medicine
2. The Delectable Negro: Human Consumption and Homoeroticism Within US Slave Culture by Vincent Woodard
3. "Abolitionists turned the tables on Europeans by accusing them of being cannibals when they ate sugar tainted with the flesh and blood of slaves."
4. Zombies (which I would class as cannibals, since they were human and need to eat humans to live) have a root in Haitian folklore and represented enslavement.
adding that, if you can find it, cannibal culture by deborah root is about exactly this. the way the white western world is a hungry, destructive force that cannibalizes non-white cultures and creates wealth and status through the cannibal colonization of those cultures.
here's the intro
i almost think there's an essay in bell hooks' black looks about this too? yes! just checked, there's an essay called "eating the other"
here it is, the funniest most absurd line spoken in all of kingdom heartsĀ