⭐

The night was pitch black, and cold. The ones only found in corners of December -not wet by rain or drizzle but dry and bone-deep cold, with wind that cuts through your cheeks and stings your face.

Theoretically, it is cold enough to turn your fingers to ice sticks, but Satoru wasn't feeling that at all. All he was feeling was warmth in his stomach and bubbly laughter climbing up his mouth, as Suguru stumbled in his pockets to find the key to his dorm.

Shoko had, as always, drunk herself to nausea and had abandoned them to go puke in her dorm. And they were too drunk to follow her.

"Come on, Suguruuuu," he says, as Suguru finally produces his key ring and is now struggling to put the key in the hole.

"You're sooo drunk, man," Satoru snickers and snatches the keys from his hands.

"Let’s see how much better you are then," Suguru gives into defeat and watches as Satoru struggles with the keys.

They stand there, huddled together due to cold and love, outside Suguru's dorm, and if someone had told them what calamity would fall upon them, they would more than definitely laugh in their face, because that’s pretty much all they can do as of now.

"Aha! See? I'm soooooooo much better!" he exclaims, as the door opens and they fall through it, stumbling, laughing, giggling like no harm in the world could come upon them.

And Satoru realizes there's nothing more beautiful in this world than a laughing Suguru, so he does what any sane person would and stares at him.

"What?"

"You're beautiful."

Suguru blushes at that but quickly recovers.

"I know that, dumbass," he replies, and then adds, "How did we even end up in this situation?" he says, as he sits on his bed, Satoru following behind.

"Well, there was this mission and then it was December, and your birthday is so close, so obviously we had to go drinking, and then one thing led to another and I think some cheap wine was involved."

"Oh god, that explains why my head hurts so much."

"OH MY GOD you're such a hypocrite, Suguru. You were the one having the most fun. Not to say I didn't have fun, I def did and like uh- "

"What?"

"God, can you stop staring at me?"

"Is it my fault the view is majestic?"

"Are you flirting with me? Because if you are, that's the most weak attempt anyone has made at all."

"Oh yes, the mighty Satoru Gojo just had to go and say that." Suguru says and then adds almost hesitatingly "We were having a moment now, weren't we?"

Satoru had closed the distance between them in a second and had kissed him. It was a sudden, fleeting thing- and then it was gone.

"Now I guess we were- we were having a moment."

And in that moment, Suguru realized in a jolt, like lightning striking a tree, how utterly and royally fucked he was.

Damn him, he's in love with the heir of the Gojo clan. That’s one way to decide how you fucking die. But on the same side, the emotions he was feeling, he had never felt before. He knew he would do anything only if Satoru asked him to. He knew in his heart he loved Satoru, wholly - all his flaws, all his personality which others cast aside as too much - Suguru realized was perfect harmony for him.

But before he could finish his thoughts, Satoru had swiped a pencil off his desk and was now standing atop his sheets.

As Suguru watched in awe, Satoru was drawing stars on the corner of his ceiling directly above his bed. And before he could ask him what he was doing, Satoru was speaking.

"Suguru, you know what, I just realized- not like I just did- it’s like I’ve known it for a while- but looking at you right now, I don’t think I can find someone who’s not only prettier but better- oh my god, Suguru Geto-"

"Wait- "

"I LOVE YOU!" Satoru announced like it was a line etched into stone- permanent and long-evolving and unchangeable and so, so, natural.

It had caught Suguru off guard. While he was plotting ways to keep his love hidden and subdued, Satoru wore his on his sleeve.

He wasn’t ashamed of it- of loving him so openly and so wholeheartedly. And so maybe Suguru can also do it.

So he tries, but his throat shuts up before he can utter the first syllable.

"It's okay, you don't have to say it back- right now or ever, I mean- if you don’t wanna say it," Satoru says, as the light drains out of his face- and that's the most horrible sight Suguru has seen in his life.

Satoru hurting because of him when he can so easily remedy it- if he could only so much as open his goddamn mouth-

"I love you too, Satoru."

The words spill out of his lips like water from a dam, stuck behind a barrier for so long when all they had wanted was to break free and spill.

Megumi woke up with a jolt that pulled Yuji from his half sleep.

"Hey, hey, hey, I'm right here," Yuji comforted in a way that came easy only to him.

It took a minute for Megumi to realize his situation. He remembers he was shamelessly staring at Yuji's sleeping form. He was adamant not to blink as he didn't want to lose a single second from the shrinking time they had left. He was to sear Yuji into his memory - how his lashes fell perfectly on his pretty cheeks. The curve of his nose and ears. Even the scars under his eyes. The reason he was going to be executed tomorrow.

As the realization dawned on his sleepy mind, Megumi's eyes became frantic.

Why is he doing this? He knew! He goddamn fucking knew from the second he met him and saw Yuji stuff down the finger that this day would come. Still, he let himself be carried away by Yuji's voice and drowned in his laugh. He should feel stupid, he thinks to himself, for knowing the bare truth and letting himself get hurt like this.

But loving Yuji, for whatever amount of time, had been something he would never trade for anything.

Even if he gets six more hours to love the boy lying beside him in his bed, he would gladly and greedily take it.

Megumi knows the next thing he's about to say is selfish and unempathetic, but at the moment, feeling bared of his skin and sorely vulnerable, he can't help but ask, in hope that maybe once the words leave his mouth they might become real, tangible, possible.

And knowing how entirely wrong it is, he pleads:

"Yuji, please stay."

His frantic eyes have turned into pools of water.

"I'll always stay with you, Megumi," Yuji assured. "Now go back to sleep, love, you've got a long day ahead of you."

"I don't want it to be day. I don't wanna see a sun that will take you away from me forever."

"Nobara said she always sees me in the sun you know, said it reminds her of me, But I don't think I am the sun, it vanishes off every day. I will stay with you forever," Yuji says as he hugs the boy closer.

There's a moment of calm where teh only thing that can be heard is the sound of this breath. Yuji's looking at the ceiling as though he's contemplating something. Megumi's looking at Yuji.

"I'd rather be like the stars. They're there. Always. Even when you can't see them in the day. They're always there. Watching you. They stay. And shine the brightest when you're in the dark, alone, sad, and suffering.

See, Megumi, I'd rather be the stars, like those." Yuji says as he points to Megumi's ceiling. He follows the line of Yuji's arm to find a constellation of stars huddled together at the corner right above his bed. They're so visible Megumi's not sure how he missed them all the months he's been staying there. They look cute he thinks, maybe he and yuji can draw more of them- "Yuji won't be here tomorrow" , a voice seethes into his mind. He can't help the words coming out of him anymore.

"I'll miss you, so fucking much," Megumi blabbered, "and— and I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I can't do anything. I wish I could do anything to stop this absolute madness, and I'm sorry Gojo can't do anything, and god, I feel so stupid. I shouldn't have let you eat that damned finger. You don't deserve this, Yuji. Not any of this."

"Nah, you're right. I don't. And you don't either. It's almost like life's unfair," Yuji says, eyes still fixated on the stars on the ceiling.

"You know, you never strike me as the type to draw on your ceiling."

"I didn't. You know they never renovated the paint here, must be from ages ago."

"I'm glad they're there, though. You can always look at them and remember me."

There's a calm silence that embraced them.

"Live a long, happy life, Megumi. I want you to be happy."

"How can I be happy when you're not here?"

The room suddenly feels colder than it is ad though those words were ice, now, with Yuji's full attention on him, Megumi's heart is thundering in his chest, half with terror, half with bewilderment. He can suddenly feel the slow moving of Earth, the fast leaping of time. Every second slipping fast from his fingers, bringing closer the moment he had feared for all these months.

And somewhere in between, he opens his mouth,

"I love you."

The words tumble out of his mouth, unused, locked and hidden away like a sacred secret, because Megumi had been all too afraid of the consequences of them coming to light, had been far too proud to say them. But here, in these final calm moments, in the arms of the boy he loves, he croaks them out—half because he finds it too cruel to let him go without telling Yuji what he means to him, and half because he would not be able to live without telling Yuji.

"I am sorry I didn't- couldn't- say it sooner, but I have loved you all this time, right from the day I saw you." Megumi confesses timidly and bright red.

"Thought this day would never come," Yuji says, laughing as he leans down to kiss Megumi's temple.

"I love you too, Megumi. Always will."

Later, when the day would come and pass, and the world would stop being colorful, when even on the warmest days the sun wouldn't smile down its brightest because Yuji would have taken a part of it with him, when he'll always be a little cold and Nobara would start smoking—

Megumi will lie in the same bed and stare at the stars.

He'll make himself believe that Yuji’s looking down at him like them and will slip into a restless slumber because he can't find peace anymore.

The sky outside will shine with bright stars, because they're there.