Medusa has been replaced but Clytemnestra is hanging on

As you know I don't really like going out in the hot sun much, and today that seemingly innocent act has left me with a watery eye and a red blotchy face. Together with that itchy throat thing to which there appears no way of relief, apart from a bizzare reflex where I try to rub the top of my soft palate with the back of my tongue.

Yeah, that doesn't work.

I try as much as humanly possible to avoid putting chemicals in me. That includes hay fever relief, and that means I have no hay fever relief. I really don't know whether my avoidance of medicines has made any appreciable difference to my overall health and happiness, other than a self-righteous psychological effect but I continue to suffer nonetheless.

I take no chemical birth control either (I did try when I was young and it just made me ill) but there are alternatives to avoid unwanted pregnancies. You can ask a man to wear a condom, you can only provide two of your three natural entrances, or you can be fitted with an invasive piece of metal, or you can just concentrate on the fairer sex.

Or you can be a female dolphin who can redirect sperm away from her eggs from the unwanted attentions of a dominant male!

I guess female dolphins probably don't suffer from hay fever, but I'm pretty sure if they did they would evolve a neat way to deal with it.

Goodness, I think I'm rambling now. Makes me realise when I get pregnant (God willing) my posts are going to lose whatever flow and cohesion they may or may not have at the moment.

Since July 1st I have a (quite long) list of things I am required to ask James for permission to do or say (part of the negotiation for being allowed to keep this blog, you're welcome ;)) At first I thought it a little draconian, but now it's in operation I feel as though he's given it a great deal of thought.

I rather like the way it reinforces his influence on how I interact with the world, I feel enveloped not in a restrictive set of rules, but a softly comforting way of keeping in step with the way we as a couple interact with the world. It's cohesive and I sense his presence in everything I do, as if I do it as part of the unit and not a free agent. It's really growing on me/us.

The Vicar has invited me to accompany him on his home visits to parishioners this afternoon, with a view to training to carry out this function as a volunteer. I'm very excited about this and feel I can make a difference to people's lives, even as a lay person.

That's probably enough of a meander through my befuddled anxiety engine, I will leave you in peace for a bit. Stay cool my lovelies 🙏

They could do with a weekend together, take her mind of other men (Oh that came out rather bitchy) Obviously I don't mind because any opportunity to spend time with the two most delightful creatures in the world, fills me with love and joy.

They'll be dropped off Friday afternoon after school, so we'll be able to put our aprons on and they'll help me cook James' dinner. I feel he may be in for a cake as well this week!

Of course auntie is the good cop to mammas bad cop, so I get to allow them all the stuff they can't normally have or do. This will include praying together, okay for the 12 year old, but still a bit of persuading to do for the 9 year old (it feels weird describing them like that, can't bring myself to use their names. But it's not like anyone could trace them... I'll give that more thought)