Nautical Nonsense

Keep in mind, it’s not a batam chicken, it has some birth defect that makes it smaller than an average small chicken, we think. I don’t know. We didn’t expect this.

This is Cicero.

We thought Cicero was a rooster, mostly from fear of him being a hen and trying to lay an egg, only to end up egg bound.

Well, today we learned that Cicero the Rooster is actually Cicero the Hen.

AND LOOK

AT WHAT

SHE LAID

A TINY EGG.

I’VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT.

IF WE HATCH IT WOULD A TINIER CHICKEN BE HATCHED??

WILL IT CONTINUE UNTIL WE HAVE THE SMALLEST CHICKEN IN THE WORLD??

WHY DID MY SISTER NAME THE CHICKEN AFTER HER MATH TEACHER??

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

Tiny dirty stray kitten hanging out at the bottom of our stairs since yesterday. There are a lot of self-reliant ferals around our apartment, but this little thing was dirty & covered in burrs. We gave it some chicken but couldn’t catch it. I think it may have wandered over from the outdoor cat hoarder colony down the street; that house is awful & we saw kittens there last week.

This morning the downstairs neighbor managed to grab it for us, and I put it on this cozy towel & started combing and picking the burrs & sticks out of its fur. It calmed down immediately and has been chilling here with me in the kitchen ever since. Got a vet appointment in an hour to get my little buddy cleaned up & checked out. I hope it isn’t too sick; I think it might have a cold.

You can ask how long it will take for the pizza to get to you, and they will tell you how far away a dispatcher is.