vicissitude of the seasons

Fake fan

Shhh... He's undercover

me: mayb…i am worthy of love n attention ? brain: unrealistic. blocked

working with kids and one of them says “you know you eat 8 spiders a night on average right?” and another goes “no no no those statistics are actually skewed by people who like eat spiders recreationally for fun and stuff” and my head snapped up like a fucking sleeper agent

Women have a great day <3 men beg for forgiveness

I think the only person I've met in real life with 100% career satisfaction was this gal I knew who was a presenter at a children's science museum and delivered every line like she was running a WWE match. Every time you passed the room where she was giving a presentation, you'd hear something like "WHO'S READY FOR CEPHALOPODS?!?" and the kids would go absolutely nuts cheering.

I originally thought those were supposed to be mushrooms, implying that this cat is moldy

i'm happy y'all made fan art of my cat. i tried to show her and she just rubbed her face on my phone

Holy shit! $1.15 for unleaded?

tomorrow im developing my theory of tuesday

it's already tuesday

just as i theorized.

they added another luftballon while you were sleeping