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@notimportantjusttrue
nastiest trick in the book is getting you genuinely deeply attached to a character whose name sounds fucking stupid in any other context. this WILL happen to you at some point in your life.
This is also one of the essential experiences in Blaseball
I'm so sad, I miss them so much, I wish I had GOOBIE BALLSON back
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hey
hey friend
dont kill yourself tonight ok
you have a really pretty smile and i know its not always easy to manage one but itd be a bummer if we never had the chance to see it ever again
youre really important and you matter a lot so stay safe and try and have a nice sleep
if you only knew the lives that this has saved
you'll feel like a total dipshit train wreck and no matter what some girl is gonna see you and think "role model". you can't kill yourself you have to go be clocky in the gas station so a 14 year old can have the trajectory of her life altered forever
as annoying as it is to work fast food, at my previous job one time a kid recognized the theta delta pin on my hat and was so fucking excited because i was the first other therian they had ever encountered offline.
"hey....are you a therian?" "yeah!" "what kind of animal?" "eh, some kinda dog" "š²š im like a wolf coyote hybrid" "that's fuckin awesome"
to be weird is to cast lifelines all around you
tags from @k1ntsug1-r0b0t-g1rl
what really drives me nuts is that like. this happens an average of x times per year as a visibly weird person, but we only get made aware of it a small fraction of the time. you can't kill yourself you have to be clocky in the gas station.
Being clocky when i was working as a barista was one of my big joys. Being clocky when i was teaching high schoolers how to play the marimba was my reason for being for half a decade. It sucks how scared I am to leave the house I live in now. But I still need to try and be clocky at the grocery store. I wish i had a job to be clocky at. Being visibly me is one of the most radical acts I'm capable of, and I hope that one day we live in a world where it isn't radical at all.
that's exactly what I was feeling when I wrote this. we all find ways to defy our fear, love is an excellent motivator.
I love going out being clocky. I love seeing a young queer as a cashier. Usually I'm wearing a mask so I imagine folks can't quitr tell until I speak. I almost always complimented on my hair by these folks too. I love being able to thank them and give them a compliment in return.
around a month ago i saw an older trans woman who was probably like 60+ with a cis woman who seemed to be her supportive wife who took her clothes shopping as customers in my store and she seemed so happy to see me there and it melted my heart so much. if you are trans your existence is so important for someone even if it doesnt feel like it. i hope shes doing alright
was also having a terrible day a bit over a week ago but a super pretty trans woman came into the store and we talked a bit after a mutual i know what you are look and she brightened my day a lot and probably doesnt even realize it. i really hope i see her again
I figured out I was trans basically as soon as I knew what a trans woman was, at age 24. Of course I'd seen trans people before, 1% isn't that rare, but I'd never known.
If I'd met an open trans woman ten years earlier, who knows where my life would have gone, so I try to be that for the people around me who would never have known
Shout out to trans women who aren't computer scientists or musicians or avant-garde artists or whatever.
Shout-out to tgirls who work at Taco Bell. Thank u queen, society would collapse without you
Over twenty years ago my big brother got me a job at a Taco Bell in the St. Louis suburbs-West County. He warned me that it was the "gay Taco Bell", but since I was coming from the "gay Howard Johnson's" I wasn't shocked. It turns out it was the black trans women Taco Bell complete with black trans women in management. And they'd worked out an arrangement with the local teen Narcotics Anonymous group so that twice a week we would shut down the drive thru and the dining room and exclusively serve 60+ teens in various stages of recovery. And many of the women I worked with were in various stages of being out or transitioning and they were from all generations from teens to over 50. One woman I worked with had a regular corporate job presenting as a man 9-5 Mon-Fri and then came to Taco Bell and worked 6pm -2am Friday and Saturday night so she could be herself surrounded by other black transwomen in those stolen weekends. And we had customers come from all over the metro area because they knew they could be themselves in the dining room. I only worked there from 1999-2001 but for young me, this was a vital, formative experience. Some of the girls came from north city all the way out to the "gay Taco Bell" on Manchester in west county because they heard it was safe to work there. Like- I know times have changed but they haven't changed much in 20 years. I'm still convinced that for lgbt youth, finding a job at your city's version of the "gay Taco Bell" is key to survival.
It's not nearly as cool, but I work in a corporate franchise tutoring center owned by two proudly neurodivergent nonbinary people of color. I know 100% that my coworkers and I, including other girls, will never have to mask or hide who we are no matter what happens in the world.
Parents come in and awkwardly whisper "my daughter is... On the spectrum," and my boss goes "yeah me too! And most of the people who work here!" Kids who've never opened up to teachers absolutely bloom when we work with them. Kids who've always "misbehaved" can focus and sit still. Very, very rarely, a student tells us quietly that they want a different name or different pronouns, and we use them excitedly and without question.
We can be a safe place for kids, for 8-year-olds, 12-year-olds who've never fit in, and we can do it today in 2026. There's gay taco bells, autistic nonbinary mathnasiums, little places everywhere that keep the lights on in the storm, and I think that's beautiful.
Edit to add: we made an arrangement with the local school district where students can attend for free, 100% paid by the state. We're in a low-income area where most families simply could not pay a couple hundred a month for tutoring, much less for multiple kids, which is the kind of thing that means poor kids get behind and stay behind. Free tutoring means these kids get to have some of the help they need to succeed and thrive in a system that's rigged against them.
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like to charge, reblog to cast.
Made these about a month ago, figured other spoonies might want to use them
2013 was five years agoĀ let that sink in
Wanna feel old? Bean Dad was this year
Realised strange nerd is an anagram of transgender and my life suddenly got better
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Hey. Things are going to get better.
You cannot prevent it.
Yes I am threatening you with a good time.
Have A Good Day, Bitch
idk man I'm thinking a lot about the discourse being reported in this post and my own post about crushes, which has garnered a lot of responses like this one
and I don't know exactly what to do with this yet but I'm fascinated, in a really upsetting way, by the way some of these people seem to conceptualize romantic and/or sexual attraction as an act of violation that no one should do to people they like and care about. if nothing else it raises some really compelling questions about what they think actually goes on between people who have sex and/or romantic bonds with each other if that's not supposed to be something that happens between friends.
normal stuff happening in the replies
oh my god I'm doing patriarchy now
This just in, "having feelings, regardless of how or whether you act upon them, is an aggressive, patriarchal act." š
Saying this as gently as possible: if you have any of the above reactions to finding out that someone has romantic feelings for you, that's on you, not on them, and your reactions are both evidence of trauma and not something you should encourage in yourself. Please seek help and healing.
I have and have had a lot of crushes, and if you can either not hear or not say "oh, cool, no thanks" without it being weird... I recommend working on that. You *have* to be able to both say no and hear no gracefully or you're gonna have real problems in many sectors
I have some exercises for this, actually, I'm not even kidding
is it worth using the words radical feminism anymore? seem distracting
I am not ceding the concept of abolishing patriarchy through radically altering society to people who think gender-segregated bathrooms are a foundational institution of women's rights! I refuse!
Pretend it says āTERFs are the ones who suckā Iām on mobile and itās past midnight
Can't be stated enough just how badly "oh, but we don't want to recognize trans women as a type of women so we'll tie the theory in knots to avoid that" sabotages any attempt at radical feminism. It immediately results in having to discard bangers like "sex itself is a social construct that reinforces patriarchy" because it implies that insofar as "real woman" is a thing, trans women are part of that category.
Sex is a social construct? Nope, too inclusive of trans women.
Feminism should include women who canāt give birth for whatever reason? Canāt have that, too inclusive of trans women.
AMAB folks are not inherently stronger/smarter/better in any way? Well we need something to cling to and use to insist trans women are different and dangerous!
Itās really fucking dire. Iāve seen TERFs insisting that actually the pink tax is good because it harms trans women. Iāve seen TERFs saying the Christian tradwife trend is āmore feministā than allowing trans women to exist. Iāve seen TERFs saying theyād rather go through all the worst parts of menopause than let trans women have easy access to estrogen and progesterone. Just relentlessly abysmal stuff.
The only thing āradicalā about TERFs brand of āradical feminismā is how radically stupid and self-destructive it is. Iāve heard this touted as reasoning for using the term FARTs instead of TERFs, but, and this is mostly just my personal take, I think weāre in too deep to change the term we refer to them with at this point. TWERF and SWERF are the only ones Iāve seen make any real waves and I figure itās because theyāre intuitive if you already know what TERF stands for and what theyāre about.
It's actually an incredible case study in theory collapsing in the face of unwillingness to adapt. You hit one sticking point where the theory implies a conclusion that this group doesn't want, and it propagates backwards until they're uprooting foundational ideas because they chose to resolve the contradiction in the exact wrong direction.
As they say, "if the theory doesn't fit the facts, yes it does abortion is bad actually why do you hate women"
there is something so fucking insulting about someone complimenting you over your weight loss when the weight loss was not intentional and was, in fact, frightening. like, thanks asshole. I wish having a BMI over 25 was the only thing I had to worry about. Iām glad you apparently believed my body was less than ideal and it is now more pleasing to you after I have been dealing with a flareup of a serious autoimmune disorder for months. I miss being able to enjoy food but Iām so glad you think I look better, apparently.
of course, you canāt say this because in the diet culture infested world that we live in, no one thinks twice about complimenting someone on their visible weight loss. it isnāt meant as a insult, itās a thoughtless comment. it is unfathomable that someone may have been happier or healthier when they weighed more. and you donāt want to have to recount your personal medical history in graphic detail to explain why losing weight was not good.
āyouāve lost weight since the last time I saw youā is a completely neutral observation, itās an acceptable comment to make in my opinion. automatically complimenting someone on it is so presumptuous and gross.
Whenever someone tells me about their weight changing I start with "and how do you feel about that?"
Because it's probably really important to them. Besides Current Society's whole thing with it, it's you, it's your body, it's the vessel you're in every single day. And if it changes, especially if it changes a lot, that's a big deal.
If they're happy, I want to whole-heartedly congratulate them on having a body they like more. If they're not, I want to sincerely sympathize about how bad that can be.
You can't know how someone feels about really important stuff without asking and it's breath-takingly arrogant to assume they'll have the same feelings you do.
P.S. This life hack works for a lot of things, like when someone tells you about surgery, a new job, a new pet, seeing family, going to therapy, going viral, divorce, playing an MMO...
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I hate the cosmetic surgery industry for so many reasons I really do. But the line between cosmetic and medically necessary plastic surgeries is as a cloud, and we cannot sacrifice bodily autonomy for bans so. We need to dismantle white supremacy and the patriarchy in order to effectively tackle the issue. I should be able to get elective top surgery without medicalising my transness you get?
I had a breast reduction when I was 16. I was so top heavy that my back had started spasming badly by the time I was 12, if I hadnāt been able to get my reduction, I wouldāve been in more extreme pain for much longer. The relief was almost instant. Just one example of medically necessary plastic surgery, in case people arenāt sure what that looks like.
Medically necessary plastic surgery also includes removing excess skin when someone loses a lot of weight: skin folds can become infected. Burn victimsā skin grafts, those are plastic surgery too. The field covers a lot more than people think.
Harold Gillies, now considered to be the father of modern plastic surgery, developed most of his techniques (many of which are still in use today) specifically to reconstruct the faces of men who'd been injured in WW1.
Advances in weaponry meant that, for the first time, men were coming home from war with literally half their faces blown off, on a regular basis. This was not only traumaticā there were cases of men cancelling engagements or being afraid to see their families, because of their disfigurementsā but also caused problems with every day tasks like speaking and eating, in which your face plays a pretty key role.
Gillies arranged for a whole ward, and later a hospital, to be dedicated to the treatment of these men, and took steps to ensure that all soldiers who received these kinds of injuries on the battlefield would be sent to him directly. He developed methods for applying skin grafts so that larger portions of the face could be repaired.
He continued his work treating wounded soldiers throughout WW1 and WW2, and when both wars were endedā just in case he hadn't done enough to establish himself as a full on heroā he was then approached by a medical student named Michael Dillon, a trans man, and was able to use the same techniques he'd developed to reconstruct the penises of wounded soldiers to give him a phalloplasty. The first one ever performed on a trans man. He even diagnosed the guy with a condition to explain the frequent operations, so as to avoid outing him.
Dillon later wrote a book about trans-ness, which inspired Roberta Cowell, who became the first British transwoman to get a vaginoplasty, also performed by Gillies.
In both cases, the techniques he developed were still being used in similar operations decades later. Gillies himself stated that he wanted no publicity for performing these operations, saying that "If it gives real happiness, that is the most that any surgeon or medicine can give.ā
So much of trans healthcare is cobbled together from the margins. Estradiol tablets are modified birth control, spironolactone is a diuretic with anti-androgenic side effects, our surgeries were developed for soldiers, it's all from someone else, for someone else, but we slipped in and learned how to make it ours.
I think that's kinda beautiful, cuz that's how we are, too. We weren't "intended" to live these lives, but we found a way to put together the pieces to make ourselves whole.
