black me out

everyone in yellowjackets is fucked up because they had to be cannibals in the woods except for callie who's fucked up because she didn't get to be a cannibal in the woods

we turned the fish Catholic

Depending on the species of fish, they might have already been doing that

Hey what was against tumblr community guidelines in the turning of the fish Catholic

The guy behind the counter at the post office was just like, "can I getcha anything else? Stamps? Pint of blood?" And the ten seconds it took me to remember my mask has vampire teeth printed on it was the longest most bewildering moment of my year so far

ice cream is food and should be bitten

ExCUSE ME it is a SOLID LIQUID and should be consumed as a combination of drinking and biting known as licking. Thank you very much.

what madness have you brought down on us

Wait what if you slurp your ice cream?

I use my lips to eat ice cream. It’s like the motion of the “QUE-” in the word ‘QUESTIONS’ in ‘Why You Asking All Them Questions’, but in reverse. It’s like using my lips as a pair of little outside-tongues.

one of my friends once deep-throated her ice cream cone

please never say that again

Reblog for ice cream discourse

finally a post for me.. im not sure if you can really bite ice cream on a bowl since ya scoop it with a spoon but i bite ice cream when on a cone and i also bite popsicles

omg now i’m like. what does this make frodo by hobbit standards

by hobbit standards, I’m afraid Frodo is probably. not conventionally attractive at all.

Frodo is the sexiest hobbit by elf standards

Every day, against my will, the LOTR fandom makes posts.

just found out that stoats hunt twice the size of them like rabbits by aggressively and eccentrically dancing around it with their little slinky rigatoni bodies so it can confuse the absolute fuck out of its prey until it can get close enough to jump on its back like some shadow of the colossus shit and take it down