Me rereading artemis fowl: dude stop that ur like 10 years old
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Me rereading artemis fowl: dude stop that ur like 10 years old

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So I thought y'all would like this too This great white comes to the jersey shore every year and this year they named her and have been tracking her hella so this is Mary Lee and she decided to show herself under this rainbow for pride month A true gay icon
#This is the representation I’ve been looking for
Grace tries copying the tones using the keyboard.
Rocky hums. “Close. Skip first note.”
“Why? You always include that.”
“This means… of Rocky, possessive. Of the speaker.”
“My.”
“Correct. But only for names.”
“So you’re calling me…?”
Rocky repeats the word: “My Grace. Yes.”
i know rocky still technically got to play with the measuring tape in the movie but the way it happened in the book always makes me smile when I read it. :]
(image IDs in ALT text !)
happy Barely Keeping It Together Wednesday to all who celebrate

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it fucks me up that tolkien only died in 1973. dude has the vibe of a victorian scholar who wrote all his manuscripts by candlelight but then you look him up and realise that he knew what color tv was. what the fuck.
Tolkien had personal beef with the Beatles
He actively encouraged Led Zeppelin to write songs based on the LOTR series and considered it an honor
When the current queen of Denmark was young, she made illustrations for his books and sent them to him under a pseudonym. He liked them and they were printed in the Danish version of the book.
WHAT
The Queen of Denmark drew LoTR fanart 😮😩
Well, it started as fanart, it became canon published artwork approved by the author.
Also he strictly forbade Disney from making any sort of cinema of his books.
[source]
Not only did this dude see the moon landing, know what color TV was and hate the Beatles, but he knew Walt Disney was a piece of shit before anyone else, and all because of some dwarves.
In 1937, in communication with American publishers regarding illustrations for The Hobbit -
It might be advisable, rather than lose the American interest, to let the Americans do what seems good to them – as long as it was possible (I should like to add) to veto anything from or influenced by the Disney studios (for all whose works I have a heartfelt loathing).
Tolkien in 1961, being a crunchy parenting advocate, lmao;
God help the children! I would as soon give them crude and vulgar plastic toys. Which of course they will play with, to the ruin of their taste. Terrible presage of the most vulgar elements in Disney.
(That’s so Montessori of him, hahaha.)
Nick Hannes
Sometimes I just look at this photo of when people had to enjoy the local canal (not optional).
Every day I handle more money than I will ever make. Every day.
At the start of my employment, my boss showed me videos of people stealing, and we both had a chuckle about it. How silly they were! There was a camera overhead, and it’s not to watch the shoppers. See, we can’t actually stop shoplifters. They get away with it maybe nine out of ten times. But we, who are watched and tallied and witnessed? We are always caught.
At first it was hard to hold one hundred dollars bills. An amount I had never seen before. An amount that didn’t exist in my household. It’s normal now. Here is something that is not for me.
“What the hell, I’ll take another,” says the man, pondering our 200 dollar watches. What the hell. Total comes to 580 and not even a flinch in his face. I have been working for 11 hours today and made only 110 dollars. It will go to my rent. Today I work for free, it feels. When I get my check, I will have 35 dollars left for food and saving.
The six hundreds he hands me go into the cash register. For a moment, I imagine having money. Then I put it away, counting out his change.
I know for a fact we sell our products for double what they are worth. That I could be making commission. That they could hand me those 580 dollars and change my life and not even mark the difference in their checkbooks. He’s not the only sale they make today, but I am the reason they made it. He’s not the only one spending 600 dollars, but if I hadn’t spent two hours with him telling me about his life, he wouldn’t have spent any. I go home. I don’t own a watch.
I have watched and rewatched a video on how to make salmon four ways. My shopping list is always the same. Pasta. Rice. Tuna. If I can afford butter it was a good week. I dream of the world I will never walk in, where I can throw the best fish fillet in the cart with a shrug. I hold hundreds in my hand and look up at the camera. I put them under the cash drawer.
I go to work. I scrap together my savings. I eat my bowl of rice slowly. My manager takes a paid week off from work just for his birthday. He owns a yacht.
I’m not worth the cost of a watch.
i wrote this while i was working at orlando’s walt disney world parks.
i was part of their college program. i moved to the state for it. they legally owned the building i was living in and still charged me rent. i ostensibly was being charged to work for them. it was a 2 bedroom apartment and they placed 6 adult women in it in forced triples.
as many as one in ten disney employees have experienced homelessness while working for the company. despite huge efforts to unionize, strike, or otherwise demand fair treatment; disney has refused to increase employee quality of life.
disney admits publicly that a good portion of their success is because the employees (“cast members”) are dedicated, passionate, and selfless. this is never reflected in pay. even “face” characters (ie those that are princesses etc) make barely above a minimum wage.
at the time that i worked there, i made $8.50 an hour. at one point i was asked to create a human shield around a bag because a bomb dog had alerted to it. for eight fucking dollars an hour.
i now work a very cushy office job. i have bought the salmon and cooked it all four ways.
i go to the store. i am nice to the person behind the counter. she looks up at the camera while she counts out my change. there is nothing fundamentally different about her and i.
we are both worth more than the watch, anyway.
have you ever suddenly + involuntarily lost consciousness
yes (fainted)
yes (head trauma)
yes (substance-induced)
yes (lack of oxygen)
yes (blood loss)
yes (multiple)
no

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Thanks for sexualizing peoples trauma fuckhead
anytime
its terrible for any number of reasons, but i think if we invent immortality there should be an extreme sport called civilizational speedrunning where teams of 20 go into the wilderness somewhere and try and be the fastest build the first internal combustion engine. i bet you could get it down to like 3 years tops
The real trick is to eat seed heavy food before the speedrun starts so your first poops are halfway to agriculture already
i want you on my team holy shit
Need More Piercings
Need more Piercings
More Piercings WILL Fix Me.
Need More Piercings
Need more Piercings

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i'm sorry i never did your tag game. i love you
I FOUMDH IT
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