Just Some Nerd From Colorado

if Tumblr is just gonna post ads with naked women then I'm just gonna post my own naked woman cause who gives a fuck

No pussy on tumblr.

A new revolutionary therapy method combines CBT, CBT and CBT. The therapist gets you high and slaps your nuts every time you think things unhelpfully.

my thrall told me it wanted to be more independent so i imprisoned its soul in a necklace. how's that for in de pendant you little shit

women who aren’t even 30 yet

leonardo dicaprio type of post

i always think abt my cousin in greece who's like obsessed with american culture, bc ill say that im going to a barbecue and she'll be like "wow.... a real life american barbecue... will there be red cups?" you bet your ass there'll be red cups. take my hand. have a hot dog. all your dreams can come true here at the real life american barbecue

your boyfriend got caught in my flypaper again please come and get him i don't want to touch him he's really gross and he keeps crying

there is wonder in the mundane you dumb motherfuker !!!

dude you look so masc wallowing in your misery like that

the gap in my resume was from when i was jacking off