What the voice in my head says.

If you’re not on your period right now just take a moment to appreciate it

I would if it wasn’t two weeks late…

real talk

Speaking as a person who is edging up on middle age in the adulthood department: this applies to life in general. You see those adults around you who are adulting and making it look easy? They’re totally faking it. No one knows what the fuck they’re doing. We’re all just shredding the boring shit and hoping we don’t fuck up too badly.

I NEED TO REMEMBER THIS

I LOVE HOW THIS DOESN’T EVEN MENTION WHAT IT’S ABOUT BUT EVERYONE KNOWS.

who else has fucking scissors for hands

There should be a British version of Friends called Mates. Starring Tom Hiddleston, Benedict Cumberbatch, Martin Freeman, Emma Watson, Helena Bonham Carter, and Tilda Swinton. The theme song should be sung by Anthony Hopkins.

Gets my vote!

Why

This is demonstrating why you absolutely do not pour water on a grease fire.

holy shit

Okaaaay. If any of you actually have a grease fire in the kitchen put the lid on the pan. It will suffocate the flames. Don’t pour water on it, and don’t freak out. Cook safely!

Or throw flour on it to smother it.

/quick safety announcement

REBLOGGING FOR LAST COMMENT TO SAVE LIVES

Please call the fire department. We are stuck.

One time when I was like 4 I was sitting in my living room staring at the carpet and I said to myself ‘I’m gonna remember this’ and I fucking still remember that exact moment I can’t believe I wasted one early memory on a vision of carpet