probably full of dog slobber

hysterectomy feels like it would clear up a lot of space for storage. if i get them to yank that sucker out can i put a beer fridge or maybe a ps2 in there

im a protected species you fucking asshole

STOP REBLOGGING I MEAN MUTUALS

burnout from not doing anything

pro tip you can just grab a bunch of random parts from dumpsters and hardware stores and computer stores and just attach them together haphazardly and then put it in your suitcase and take it to the airport and get arrested pretty much 100% of the time

hate it when you see something in media that has great kink potential so you skedoodle post-haste to ao3 only to discover there's none fic left beef and then you have to sit there going oh I see I'M the pervert weirdo I'M the problem with society and everyone else in the world is going to heaven with a hundred innocence dollars preloaded onto their ole fashioned wholesome funtimes themepark fast pass card like fuckin oath man

I love browsing cover-up tattoo stuff when every once in a while there's someone asking "how do I cover up this unspeakably idiotic thing" and people are like "please do not cover that up, that's fucking amazing." You just have "shrimps is bugs" written on your leg now. That's your legacy.

Have you seen that one weasel tattoo that someone was asking coverup advice for? One of the best tattoos I've seen.

It's so fucking beautiful I'm in tears. Laughing so hard I'm crying but what difference is that really.

How quickly we forget the dangerous crow boy who’s job it is to destroy plastic

I had a dream about getting stuck in an elevator 4 times in a row and I work in a place with an elevator that I avoided until I realized that was stupid and took the damn thing and you'll never guess what happened when I reached my floor

notice how everyone is horny today

I always think of the description I saw years ago: Self-imposed deadlines don't help me, because I know the person who set them, and they're full of shit.