Place To Be

putting ketchup on fries is too permanent for me … i have to dip . i control the sauce

It's never too late to escape from the secret underground government facility you were raised and go on a telekinetic rampage across the city before mysteriously disappearing into the woods

If you enjoyed this book you should read every other book in the world for extra textual context. All things are intricately related to one another.

it’s as if labor is needed to reproduce the circumstances that maintain the status quo and since you benefit from that I’m obligated to perform it….

he's so hot i need to feed him the world's most perfect strawberry

i wouldn't necessarily have a problem with seeing a doctor whose name was dr skull. but if his office was in a cave i'd be alert for signs of a lair

they should invent something that reduces the amount of pain you are experiencing.

god I'm such a slut for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce *decides it’s inaccurate to refer to myself as a slut in light of my minimal sexual activity* if The Enemy discovered my ardor for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce, they would gain a significant strategic advantage

See the thing about ghosts in the afterlife seeing you jerk off is that when you die and reach the afterlife your odds of meeting a ghost that saw you jerking off are slim unless you are the last guy alive in history and then they're all just tossing peanuts at you

feels good as fuck to know no matter how dire it gets there’s another bitch with a blog going through the same god damn thing almost word for word somehow

one day, i hope to be moved from your downloads folder into somewhere more deliberate