a good amount of you are going to hate me for this but to a similar end as far as social stigma goes, i also dont think people who experience paraphilic attraction are inherently predators or abusers.
i believe people have free will and can choose to make decisions that don't lead to the harm of another person, regardless of how they feel. and if you're confused, i am saying that as a survivor of CSA/SA myself:
i hold no ill will to people who experience attraction to minors, have not abused a child, and refuse to ever abuse a child. i believe these people who feel attraction contrary to their morals exist. i imagine they don't want to be seen out of fear people won't believe in their humanity.
if there's one thing my trauma has taught me, it's that no one, not a soul, deserves to be punished for simply existing as they are, in ways they cannot control. i don't believe in punishing people who haven't hurt anyone and agree that it's wrong.
the only people i hate in this world are the ones who harm children and innocents. i.e: people who have decided to do inflict emotional or physical harm on someone else, when that person poses no real threat to anyone.
a threat to me is the intent, plan, or act to harm a person who isn't actually acting harmful to others. not someone who experiences an attraction that not even they want to be feeling.
i can imagine what sort of hell it would be, trying to go through life with a secret, knowing that no matter how much of your true, genuine self you are, no matter how kind and just you are, if anyone were to know what you carried, they would hate you.
i have lived it a thousand times, for many different reasons: im disabled, queer, autistic, plural, emotional, integrity-driven, and have kinks myself. i have no reason to hate paraphiles. i have every reason to hate child abusers.
i nor anyone else is the judge, jury, and executioner on an entire neurotype. paraphilia lacks any sort of realistic and grounded understanding in the general population due to misinformation about how child abuse even happens in the first place.
clue: many sexual abusers are not paraphiles, and even when they are, it doesn't look how you expect. abuse and assault are about power and control. not attraction. pushing the idea that harm is about attraction only results in more traumatized and dead children. if you cant recognize a child abuser when they're right in your face because you're imagining a perverted boogeyman, how are you helping anyone?
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