i'm in every moment we were together all at once

(please note all post time stamps are in my local time, which is currently Newfoundland Daylight Time (UTC -02:30) so they probably won’t line up with the time of posting either in the original poster’s time zone or yours, dear Reader. They are just there to establish a timeline.)

This is definitely one of those that may never be truly completed, because Connie is different from the other bits I’ve seen in this fandom in that we’re a little more invested in her as her own character, and we’re building her whole life from the ground up, one text post and anonymous ask at a time. 

First thing’s first, you will need to know what Connor Storrie wore to the Met Gala on Monday, May 4, 2026, particularly after he removed the suit jacket. 

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If I could summarize the Connie phenomenon, it would be with this quote from Jake @kaijuerotica : “hey if you're free later, me and the mutuals are ensouling a joke about one specific picture from the met gala. yeah, it's gonna be all day so stop in whenever” and this one from Nick @cuppydogshane : “we ensouled an outfit. we can do Anything” 

If we’re doing a “quick and dirty” rundown of who Connie is, I really like this description from Jes @ticklefighthockey : “i believe connie is the ann taylor-wearing alterego of connor storrie (inspired by his met gala blouse lmao)... she works in HR (human relations not heated rivalry) and is crushing on big hud who works in sales... but on a deeper level i think connie is whoever you need her to be…”

And this answer from Bea @virginshane is a more thorough, but still succinct, summary.

Ready? Okay. 

The official inception of Connie from admin was this wonderful joke from Teddy @loontattoo (May 5, 6:04pm): “Hahaha yeah that’s just connie from admin. she got a little wild at the staff holiday party. classic connie.”

Now. If you’ve read the Shane’s mouth frog and the Shoon masterlists, you’ll probably know that I don’t usually start at The Beginning. I like to go back and look for the history - to see if there were any rumblings of a particular fandom phenomenon before it achieved critical mass (if you will forgive the dreadful mixing of metaphors). I love this because it shows a) how in sync we are, as a fandom and b) all the Bits we do here are so collaborative. The collective consciousness of the tumblr Heated Rivalry fandom is a beautiful thing. 

So, in keeping with tradition, let’s go back, to -22.10 hours BCE (Before Connie’s Era): 

[NOTE: I’m calling this section “Protoconnieposting”, inspired by Nick’s tag on his reblog of his own post, after Connie’s official inception.]

After seeing Connor’s outfit without the jacket, Grace @graceebooks posted (May 4, 7:58pm): “im not kidding he dresses like me every time. i wore this without the train to court last week” [NOTE: Grace is a woman, a lawyer, and, if I remember correctly, she indicated in another post that she is 41 years old.] 

One minute later: “connor storrie said i WILL dress like a forty year old woman and it WILL look incredible” (7:59pm)

9:43pm: “you guys have to accept that connor storrie contains multitudes and one of those facets is he wants to dress like a forty year old woman when the whole world is watching”

The following day, Julia @poetrylesbian posted a photo of Connor’s outfit paired with a screenshot of the Onion headline “Suburban Mom Wows Family With Most Androgynous Look Yet” (May 5, 8:31pm)

In the meantime, Hudson Williams’ outfit was also revealed…

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..and Rowan @themoonandmyman posted this (May 4, 9:19pm): “Listen they both look good. by virtue of being extremely attractive men. it’s also vulcan wine aunt and her boy toy matador wolverine”

THEN, we got a video of Connor waving at the person filming with a big smile on his face as he went into the gala. Thank you to @sheisraging for this gif:

That gif was posted at 10:21pm. 

At 10:52pm, Grace reblogged the gif above with the tag #literally a texas wine mom my beloved

At 10:55pm, @armitsicko posted “she’s late to her MEETINGS but she still waves to the crowd”

11:09pm: Cece @twirlingfreckles : like if Connor wants to dress like the regional manager of chicken salad chick I think we should support him in that

THEN, at 11:13pm, Kostas @24x81 debuted her CEO/matador universe: “it's that beautiful middle-aged corporate CEO woman and his david bowie matador lover and life partner on that red carpet tonight “ We’ll come back to that, because they expanded on the concept quite a bit the following day. 

BUT. In the meantime…

We got pictures of Connor dancing at the Met Gala (Thank you, @butdarlingthestarrs ) which included THEE iconic photo that birthed Connie (May 5, 1:06am) and Grace reblogged the photoset with the tag #oh my god when mom comes along to the party and has a few too many margaritas !! (1:24am)

Some more examples of proto connie posts on May 5:

From Grace, on a photo of Connor with Charlie XCX and Tate McRae: #literally mom #with goth daughter and cheerleader daughter (1:44am)

From Nick, that chic young woman is going places. in her powersuits (1:11pm)

From @ilyastits : when you’re six drinks in and the dj hits the “let’s go girls” (2:05pm)

From Yaz @nonlynear : the sweet texan woman that lurks beneath a thin veneer of butch woman that lurks beneath a thin veneer of muggy gay guy (6:47pm) 

Okay let’s go back to Kostas’ CEO/matador universe and the stuff she posted about it on May 5th! 

#he really was giving corporate CEO woman of the year under 40 on Forbes magazine (11:08am) (thank you for the pictures, @actuallysara )

they're arguing because she has been in back to back meetings negotiating this merger and she's had to miss his last two matador shows or whatever they're called… (11:12am)

you'd think he would spend a lot of time in Spain but no. trying to break into the matador market on the west coast. she's on the east coast - it's where corporate hq is... (12:31pm)

she goes by connie. she does call him big hud cause he refers to himself in the third person as big hud…. (2:19pm)

connie takes big hud to his gala fundraisers and private business dinners cause she likes her arm candy… (2:35pm)

connie and big hud wintering in mykonos… (2:39pm)

connie in a power suit yelling at someone on the phone and big hud getting so hard so fast his vision blacks out for a second (2:45pm)

connie is the queen of day to night looks… (3:12pm)

early morning connie in her matching pajama set and embroidered silk bathrobe making espresso for him and big hud… (4:51pm)

And literally one hour and 13 minutes later, Tedanthony middlename lastname loontattoo typed the immortal words “Connie from admin” and hit post.