somebody cut and pasted the wrong leg onto this cat

this cat looks like a coworker at a restaurant who has been “saving up for the other sleeve” for 5 years

sometimes someone I follow falls victim to severe Character delirium to the point where they stop even saying the character's name and just refer to them by an epithet like some kind of malevolent entity whom they don't wish to accidentally summon, so if the sickness sets in quickly enough and I don't pay close attention for a week I'm just Never going to figure Who this bastard haunting my friend Actually Is. and I'll spend months scrolling my dash occasionally seeing appeals to "that fucking horse" or "my evil grub."

its always "what are your plans for the future, you should really be planning for the future" and never "wow that character you're obsessed with sounds so cool can you explain them to me. im sure you get them more than anyone else"

complimented a womans clear raincoat this morning and she said Well i feel like a sandwich

i swear if the wizard doesnt let me out of his abandoned salt mine soon im gonna fucking LOSE IT

what did you do to be put into the salt mine

i MAY have eaten his special wizard meal. but i think he should let me out tbh

was it good? was it worth it? are you able to bear the weight of your sin?

im not gonna lie it was fucking delicious i would fucking do it again. wait shit youre the fucking wizard in disguise seeing if ive learned my lesson arent you. fuck.

10 YEARS IN THE ABANDONED SALT MINE.

I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever

The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late

For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral

@garaks-padded-cell for the archives if don’t have it already

Aw this was like. My first ever post.

yet another cosmic unfairness: a manatee is some kind of big fat dumpling beast of the sea that wants you to pet it so bad we had to make laws against doing just that for their safety

I loved when “Drift Compatible” entered pop lexicon cause we were in DESPERATE need for a way to platonically express “one of us to the other is as a limb to a body; we are a left and right feet of a dancer; we do not need to speak because any one word inspires an exchange of unspoken words that conveys a full conversation in which a mutual conclusion is determined in an instant”. Huge win for the QPRs out here

I also really love that the movie explicitly shows that drift compatibility can be any form of relationship. Two brothers, three brothers, husband and wife, father and son, two friends who have lost everything to the same enemy. It isn’t about the way you connect, it’s about the connection itself. And of course, that connection lets you put boots to asses and kill alien monsters together. Because the power of human connection can change the world or something.