aHEem/wHIMper

At the local hamburger shop and they said yelled out “order 167!” And three middle school age kids yelled in perfect unison “ 6 7!” Life is sometimes so beautiful

If you reference 67 you deserve to be executed on the spot tbh

If I was king for a day the first thing I would do would be to sentence you to a life full of love and understanding.

worry about it kitten daddy fucked up

don't worry kitten daddy got it

start worrying kitten daddy fucked up

I'm perfectly fine with people criticizing my favorite stories and frequently do it myself but can you stop being so boring about it

"This scene made me so uncomfortable" given the subject matter, it would be really, really badly written if it wasn't.

*looking at the OC I crafted with my own hands* what the actual hell is her problem

it’s weird that professional letters are supposed to start with “dear.” i don’t even call my mom that

my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position

i'm afraid the phrase "touch my wee wee touch my fucking wee wee!" has become a consistent part of my internal monologue vocabulary

give me booboo wheel... i must have booboo wheel i simply must!