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MY REVIEW:

It has been some time since I’ve written a lava lamp review; times have been hard on the personal side of things, my excitement decreased, and – though it may not seem that way on first blush – these reviews are actually rather taxing for me to write. But the Fluidium has remained on my mind: it is my most desired lava lamp, the last holy grail of my collection. My ambitions to own it have been long rebuffed by the rarity of the lamp and the price point at which it is resold. I felt I owed it to the Fluidium, which so occupies my thoughts, to at least give it a review.

SILHOUETTE: 10/10

When I’ve shown people pictures of the Fluidium (which I’m prone to do), it has sometimes gotten a few laughs. People have compared it to a sex toy or a suppository. Here, I aim not to defend it from such comments. Sure: the Fluidium is a bit phallic. Does that need defending against? The lamp feels organic, alive; it emerges from its base like a natural growth. Its very silhouette resembles the shape of the wax within it rising up into a bubble. The Fluidium renders the lava lamp a fact of nature, an inevitability. It is utterly legible; it makes sense. And yes, it is sensual. It is my belief that lava lamps are very sensual objects (stay tuned, if I were to get around to it, for my top 10 list of most erotic lava lamps!), and the Fluidium leans into that sensuality gracefully, luxuriates in it with nonchalance.

DETAILS: 9/10

It’s difficult to review the detailing of the Fluidium, because it is striking mainly through its lack thereof – the absence of ornamentation is its very strength. I appreciate the use of the polycarbonate base and cap, rather than metal – an off-brand copy of the Fluidium, the Balvi Magma, uses the same shape but swaps in metallic bases and caps (and more classic colorways), and the stylishness and appeal of the Balvi Magma is significantly decreased by these modifications. It is in observing its pale imitator that the Fluidium’s elegance and restraint shines the most. I however deduct one point for the stria along the base of the model – I assume they are structural, but I feel the minimalism of the model would have been polished by their absence.

A Balvi Magma lava lamp. I mean... It's just not the same, is it?

COLORWAYS: 10/10

The Fluidium only came in four colors: green, yellow, white, orange. I have seen a few pictures floating around of modified Fluidiums, caps and bases painted other colors, waxes and fluids swapped out… Though I want to be supportive of the spirit of modification and customization of the lava lamp community, I can’t help but look at these modded Fluidiums as abominations. It was already perfect!, I want to scream. It never needed purple fluid or a cartoonish mix of green and orange! It was already everything it needed to be: the right colors, the restraint not to bombast, the intentionality of a design that does not need to appeal to everyone, to offer every color. The Fluidium’s limited colorways are purposeful and complete; there are no others I would wish to see it in.

(I chose not to include pictures of modded Fluidiums out of respect for their owners since I have nothing good to say about them, but you can find plenty such pictures with a Google search.)

POWER: 8/10

To me, the Fluidium is one of the most powerful lava lamps – but I feel to give it a 10 here would betray its design ethos. The model is not here to blow you away, to draw all attention to itself. It is almost discreet, an accessory rather than a centerpiece. Its appeal lies in the very fact it is not the most powerful, the most impressive lamp out there. Rather, it would fit into a space easily, slot itself wherever it is set as if it was always meant to be there, this strange, beautiful fungal light.

MY FINAL LAVA SCORE: 9.25/10