from the earth to the morgue

Break up with your LOSER BOYFRIEND start an AUDIO FICTION PODCAST for an audience of THREE PEOPLE get on HORMONE REPLACEMENT THERAPY and NEVER KILL YOURSELF EVEN THOUGH THE WORLD WILL KEEP BREAKING YOUR HEART FOREVER

(person who has only seen the world through their own eyes voice) im getting a lot of "relates this back to my own experiences" vibes from anything and everything that's ever occurred or existed

sex isnt real. romance isnt real. apple juice is real and a refreshing treat.

we have to thank our brave soldiers in fandom who write gen fics. we have to thank our brave soldiers in fandom who write character studies and stories with no focus on romance or sex. we have to get on our knees and thank the brave soldiers in fandom who write about minor characters and friendship and family with no focus on romance or sex. i know it’s hard to care about characters in a world that seems to only revolve around ships but i see you. and i love you

It's nice that loud noises don't stick to clothes like smells do. That would be really bad if they did.

the secret to organising any kind of trip with your friends is to become the benevolent dictator. do NOT wait for everyone to provide a consensus on things before you book anything. do it and then ask for feedback after. do not ask people what they would like to do just tell them what is happening and let them all nod along like the sheep they are. this is the ONLY way to coordinate a group of adults in their 20s/30s

ever since i was a little girl i knew i was doomed to take things too seriously and think about them forever

taking antidepressants and listening to nine inch nails so the effects cancel out and my libido comes out perfectly normal

I have had a lot of evil people say to me that nothing taste as good as skinny feels and every time im like no im pretty sure food tastes really super good actually

hey sorry I snapped at you, I've just had a really hard day and [remembers focusing on myself is selfish] maybe it's your fault for provoking me?

his pathetic and emotionally repressed nature has enamoured me

i like it when people compliment me. i like it... when people like me. (looks around to make sure nobody is about to shoot me)