i'm thinking abt how a lot of people don't understand that loving someone and being in love with them are two diff things. they are not always mutually exclusive, often go hand in hand and that's why we get confused. but at some point when a relationship develops and gets serious, you will often have to make the decision to love someone.
i'd wager to say that a lot of people are in love with their partner but they don't actually love them. they love the feeling of being in love, the process of infatuation, the honeymoon phase. when all of that is over and the time comes where you have to consciously decide to love someone, that's where a lot of people chicken out.
the thing is love isn't just a feeling, it's also a choice and it's not always an easy choice, even with the "ideal" partner. really getting to know a person and deciding you want to spend the rest of your life, or at least, a long time with them is a big decision and...i think a lot of people actually aren't ready for that, they just think they are because society pushes romantic love on us like it's the end all be all of life and then infatuation does the rest, at least for a while.
i think a lot of people don't realize they are actually better off focusing on other forms of love that don't come with infatuation and sexual attraction. and that doesn't mean that we should all go "monk mode" or whatever and forget about romantic relationships completely. however friendships, community, hobbies to be passionate about, are actually what most people genuinenly need the most in their lives.
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