whatever needs to be said was said in iris by the goo goo dolls

hate when I rb a post that i think is just good but it turns out it's vaguing like fifteen other posts and now it looks like I've take a Stance even though I just woke up and haven't even been born yet truly

number one rule! never believe ur thoughts after 10 pm . unless its about The Character then believe all of your thoughts wholeheartedly

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

you can post on tumblr even when you're trying to take a break from social media it literally doesn't count. it's like pepsi max, or pescatarianism

Use your PTO

month starting on a monday we have no excuse guys lets get to work and lock the fuck in

yk its actually very chic and avant garde to start on tuesday the second

many claim theres nothing more subversive and revolutionary than starting on wednesday the third

there are simply no words in the english language that can describe starting on thursday the fourth. thats how iconic it is

choosing to start on friday the fifth. i just think its very inspiring

lets all kill ourselves

today i just (remembers to maintain privacy online) did something really cool. you have to trust me

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

you’ll be a teenager in the early 2010s watching with fascinated horror the rise of gamergate and r/mensrights and be like “wow this is fucked up, good thing it’s just online” and then it will turn into the entirety of mainstream politics for the rest of your life