Fckin

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

people on tumblr love adding "this is the funniest comment ive ever read" "every part of this image hits like a truck" "okay but can we talk about (lists all the things that make a joke funny)" in the comments. why dont you keep your voice down and let the posts wash over you in blissful silence

gnome

what was that. did you guys see that

they’re? just? sitting there ???

it makes it 100% better that i can’t understand her, i feel like i’m hearing what cats hear

I’m sorry but this is the funniest thing I have ever seen ever in my fucking life her PEETS are STICKING OUT

idk if I talked about this here but so much of writing decisions are just about, like, rhythm and flow and sound. i spent way longer agonising over a joke about "weird chip flavour in a gay bar" than the joke really warrants because it was like, okay so obviously it would be prawn cocktail but this is an American gay bar, so actually I think it's cheese-and-onion because that's smelly and you don't want your patrons to be eating smelly chips because then they won't want to make out, but again the US does sour-cream-and-onion which is pretty close but really wrecks the flow of what is supposed to be a fun, snappy exchange of jokes because the meter is terrible (SOUR cream and ONion) so I had to go with salt-and-vinegar (SALT and VINegar) instead and that's how just how writing is. the curtains are blue because even though this character would almost definitely have electric green curtains, they need to match the colour of the curséd amulet and maybe there are electric green precious stones? quickly duckduckgo "electric green jewels" "electric green gemstones" "gemstones green scale" hmm okay maybe. but do my readers know this? but we all know about sapphires and shit, right, that's a good classic colour for an amulet, so i guess the curtains are blue now

sorry im late i got tied with rope to train tracks and it was this whole thing

I am whatever the opposite of a speed runner is. I am a game meanderer. I have to look at literally everything. I am overly cautious in every way. I forget to pause and wander away from the game. I take a minimum 7 hours to get through any given level. If you give me a timer I will cry.

show me another funny picture im not driving tonight

Just drank a hot cup of Hava 🍵

What is hava

Hava niceday

needless to say they are hopelessly dependent on the ingot