Knitting Anarchist.

roommates approach unloading the dishwasher with what i can only describe as a surrealist sensibility. putting dishes in places not even god himself would think to put them

The last of the classically trained tumblrinas

i love poison omelette

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got some kick to it i tell you what

daddy has regretfully informed kitten that we need a dual income household to survive

duuuuuude you have GOT to come out tonight we're enacting cruelty upon those who have transgressed so badly that we can justify any act against them... and you KNOW we're interpreting our delight as moral righteousness... Yeah it's fucking crazyyyyyyy get an Uber

shoutout to boring queer people who don’t do shit. just go to work or school and then come home to watch shows. while gay

i LOVE the word decorum . like please! have some decorum ✋

the phrase really should be "eat your cake and have it too" im with the unabomber on this one

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son

OP are you telling me we got the death of Gică Petrescu before we got gta6

the thing about being "good with kids" is all it takes is literally just not trying to control and mould them with every interaction. it's just being a normal person and engaging with them through normal interactions like having conversations and playing games. it's just being genuine and friendly and not perceiving them as lumps of wet clay you are there to shape. "oh you're so good with kids" thanks it's because I think they are people

Baby sphinx trying to be like mama and waylaying travelers, but all its riddles are completely non-sensical like the ones a 1st grader would tell

age 111: Bilbo Baggins themed birthday party

John Christopher Jones, Design Methods

atheist quarterback throws a hail darwin

agnostic quarterback throws a hail maybe