The world is ahead

I think if a billionaire gets murdered and you can't narrow down the suspects because too many people have motive you should just let them have their w

I don't love mob rule but maybe just for the united healthcare ceo, yknow... just this once

Maybe we All killed the united healthcare ceo. It's a christmas miracle

I still think about when Owl City sang "and I'll kiss you between the ears". What the fuck does that mean. I can't get over it

i wondered this for like a year before I realized the line immediately preceding it was "we'll take a long walk through the cornfield" and it clicked and I haven't been the same since

His puns are simply of a calibur too high for the commonfolk to comprehend

if this happened like 5 years ago people would be losing their shit, now it’s just like “oh yeah another thing”

What the fuck even prompted that lmao

according to wikipedia it the youths viewed it as anti-christian, promoting illegal immigration and linked to the antifa movement

That random metal pillar? Yeah that’s antifa

Which also kind of drives home how weird it would have been for both Frodo and Sam to suddenly be travelling with what was basically the equivilent of like... rumplestiltskin... from their childhood bedtime stories.

OUTTA TOUCH THURSDAY!

why do I have a feeling this was scheduled

I have it queued for every Thursday, I just got the AM/PM wrong this week.

honestly when aliens arrive we should start having sex with them as soon as possible. so when they decide to take over a lot of them already have emotional connections/physical offspring and will form a sizeable resistance. not me, i don’t want to, but i know a lot of you would be into that, and i’m telling you it’s okay, you’re actually the last hope for our species.

thank you op this means a lot

oh my fucking god

It’s five am. I can’t send this to every coworker I’ve ever had right now, so you get it instead

you CANNOT hold me accountable for accidentally making a homestuck reference when i've never read homestuck. if you recognized it that's YOUR problem it's YOUR sin.

People love to be like “oh hee hoo hoo I caught you making a homestuck reference” as if it isn’t like a billion pages long and presumably mentioned everything in existence at least once

Are you shitting me?

this is what i like to see

Ancient history