Millie

i just rescued a pill bug they’re gonna reward me with a million pill bucks i’m gonna be a fucking pillionaire

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I JUST MADE ONE PILLION DOLLARS

Me in 2026 practicing internet safety: who wants an updated list of my medications

How do I... use this? I don't know what to do ;-;

here’s a youtube tutorial by the guy who made it

it’s ok to ask for help the next 946 days

FANDOM ETIQUETTE NEEDS A RETURN SOOOO STRONGLY

do not start gambling. go outside and locate a bug. now post it on inaturalist. bam. nature's gacha game

to be honest, kitten doesnt know how many more “ok 💗 yay 💗”s they have left in them

Galaxies are yurinating...

don't say it like that

uses my evil sex mind control powers to make you come cuddle comfy in bed

Girl trust your intuition

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

i think being proud of where you come from is one of those things that becomes fun the more specific you get. like "proud to be english" bad rancid vibes. makes you sound like the kind of person who rants about immigrants. "proud to be from yorkshire" better vibes. i cannot deny the yorkshire cultural heritage. "proud to be from pocklington" absolutely fucking hilarious please never let anybody kill your pocklington pride.

we need to bring back the phrase "what business is it of yours" in a big way i'm serious

i know you can just say "none of your business" but phrasing it as a question with a jarringly formal tone is the ideal way to shoot an overfamiliar unwelcome overture dead in its tracks and force the person making it to confront the boundaries they're taking for granted + it would really piss people off which is funny

&also it allows you to experience the joy of talking like an autistic vampire, which i highly recommend

AITA for realizing that my best friend is actually a ghost and not telling him because i'm worried that if he realizes he's dead he'll finally be able to accept it and fully pass on and i won't be able to hang out with him anymore?

AITA if i've been dead for a while but haven't told my best friend yet because he doesn't seem to have realized i'm a ghost and if he does i'm worried that he'll finally be able to accept it and let me go and i can't bear the thought of losing him?

AITA for killing that guy