you can't hurt me, i've been on tumblr since 2011

you look like the kinda girl who'd open up ms paint back in the day select the spray paint tool and click and hold to watch it slowly turn into a perfect circle

the author's poorly disguised home address

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

I can't watch a television show until a demon possesses me and compels me to do it

Forgot to close a parenthesis and now spirits enter me like a waterslide

Haven’t posted about plastic in a minute. Rest assured, I am still hard at work eating all plastic on earth

cd has a hole. record has a hole. casette has 2 holes. streaming? zero holes. i think i’ve made my point

Alan Turing and Ada of Lovelace did not invent computer science for the girls and the gays to claim they can't do math

Oh easy mistake. Yearning actually rises from the floor and longing hangs from the ceiling

I think some of y'all would really benefit from learning the scope of power of various political offices.

Are you trying to tell me my local schoolboard doesn't have the ability to declare a unilateral ceasefire with iran?

If they try hard enough and are pure of heart... still no.

the real moral lesson in chess is that you can only move forwards 5-6 times in your life before you're turned into a beautiful queen but also rarely you might be turned into a horse

For the first time in my tenure on tumblr, it's "THAT'S A PHOTOGRAPH?" and not "THAT'S AN OIL PAINTING?"

high as fuck lowballing never worn baby shoe listings