me when get

every political scandal has to be called ____gate now because 54 years ago a guy named blowjob told reporters there were bugs in the democrat offices

im moving arbitrarily. im just doing shit

This shit is irrelevant to me, man

this shit ain't nothin' to me man, I gave blowjobs to millions of us voters 3 FUCKING TIMES

imagine getting first chair in the band in whiplash and being like fuckkk now i have to sit near the drummer who’s always sweating and spitting and crying and bleeding everywhere

nothing bottom jeans and boots with the nothing

the whole club was gone

I reference this literally every time I'm at a bar because I'm somewhat convinced I saw it in a tumblr post somewhere but I have been informed that this is not in fact a known tumblr post in circulation and I was shown a prophetic vision at some point leading me to form the dichotomy from first principals

call my dick the tower of babel the way god wont let me erect it

when you’re mean to me this is literally who you’re being mean to *image of me perched atop a throne of human skulls on a cliff above the ocean, howling wind and shrieking seagulls, and the dream goes on forever, one single static frame*

im listening to some above ground normal shit youve probably heard of

my buddy says the craziest stuff when i make him plead for his life

i was not created in a lab but i will be destroyed in one