Mercuree Rising

Hey there Guys and Gals!!! I know I shouldn’t have left you all for as long as I did, however there has been a great reason for my absence... Before I get into the wonderful surprise, I want to offer my sincerest apologies to all of you who were actively checking on this site to see if I showed up. I haven’t neglected this page for no reason... I have been building and working on my brand: Mercuree The Personality and The Break Room Talk Show!!! I am 2 years into this venture and doing very well. The talk show has been picked up for the 3rd quarter.. I have had my 1st year anniversary for it’s debut air date: January 14th, 2016!!! I am in my 2nd year and 3rd season (based on how the quarters go and how many times I come on a month. The Break Room airs on Bric TV’s public access cable network: Brooklyn Free Speech Network 3, every 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month at 10pm est., on channels 56 Time Warner, 69 Cablevision/Optimum, 84 RCN, 44 Verzion Fios (this channel airs in all 5 boroughs). It also streams live on the internet at www.bricartsmedia.org for those who do not live within the 5 boroughs or do not have those channels; all they have to do is click BRICTV, then scroll down to the box with the 3 in it. I have been working on airing valuable content for the viewers, as well as learning hands-on how to edit. I taught myself how to produce, direct, edit and host a whole talk show, so that is why I haven’t been here in a while.

I took one year to learn everything, then spent a year doing it...now this next year coming I am learning how to brand myself and market myself to these other networks. I have made plenty mistakes along this journey, cursed a few people out as well and cried a few rivers too, yet essentially everything has been going smooth. I have the best team at the tv studio/network and I am building a very strong team behind the scenes as well. My circle has switched around dramatically... the people I thought had my back, have proven that they liked me when I was down and literally want no parts of me now that I am back on my square stronger than ever. Some people can only deal with you when you are down and out...they can not deal with you when you are on your feet for reasons that are in their own head and reasons I wish never to have to figure out ever again. I spent enough time in my life trying to figure out why people this and why people that... man phuck all that... let people be people is my final answer from now on. I can only know what I’m doing and figure my own stuff out.. I can only work on and change myself...not these other humans that come in and out of your life for their own benefits and if you are not beneficial then you are out anyway.. Might as well be the one to do the kicking out... I learned that at a great time in my life and so glad that I am taking heed.. see... taking heed is what learning truly is... not the mere knowing of a thing.. you must apply what you know in order to fully learn it and it’s effects of application.

I never mean to preach or act like I’m giving sermons from the mound...it will always appear that way because I am authentic and only speak when I have something to say as well as know that what I am saying is tried and true. I only wish to steer the people in the right direction and show myself in the most honest light possible. I had to start my life over three times along my journey, and the first two times my focus was not in the right place yet in the right place (if that makes sense), I just wanted in the music industry by any righteous means necessary, yet I was surrounded by the wrong people (that’s where the displaced focus was), so I got stomped on and kicked around... That threw me for a loop, there goes me having to start over for the second time... bad marriage was my third time and that is when I switched up everything after I escaped with my life and clothes on my back. Took me 5 years to figure so many things out... and nope.. I do not have it all figured out, yet what I did was I removed all the stuff off the table that did not belong to me to figure out much less rent space in my humble abode.

Once I removed all the stuff on the table that did not belong to me I was left with three things to rid myself of that belonged to me, three things to figure out about me, and three things to accomplish before my last day on this beautiful cursed earth... during those 5 years I learned all about me again.. I use the word ‘again’ because I got reminded of some great stuff during this period of my life; and I don’t mean “great” in a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ way.. I just mean great.. plentiful, intriguing, lovely and humbling. I found everything I was looking for and just went to work. I began working on it all...and came out with these two things: I always been a Personality and I have to pay it forward even though I never “made it”. One day, in 2013, I was taking a shower and “The Break Room” popped in my head.. At the time, I needed a name for my next venture... had no clue what it would be...so I would keep thinking of names... until that day in the shower when the best name on earth came to me mid lather!!! 

The Break Room Talk Show started out as a showcase called: ‘The Break Room Showcase’, for all up and coming artists’ in the Hip Hop and R&B scene...then I kept getting hit with all these club prices and walk-thru prices and I felt like everyone was being so greedy and showing that it’s still not about talent and helping this dying art gain exposure in a more positive light and higher frequency... That’s when I decided to turn my showcase into a talk show and expand it to feature guest that are not only gifted and talented artists in music, but all spectrums of entertainment and fashion, as well as entrepreneurs with their own businesses and such. I started out interviewing enterprising people with no network behind me... I was filming people with my handheld camcorder in McDonald’s fast food restaurants.. .club hallways... classrooms... wherever I could get my shine on...and I just held on to all the footage... held onto it for 2 years... then something wonderful fell in my lap!

I was doing someone else’s talk show (being a model for a fashion designer friend of mine), and the producer of the young ladies show told me that I need my own show... that my energy and conversation needs it’s own spotlight and that they would like to sponsor my first couple of shows, but first he’d like to interview me on his own show. I was way excited... I got all dolled up, had my other designer friend lend me one of his top of the line designs and I came there dressed to the 9′s... him and his co-host, however, came in looking like they just rolled out of bed.. I was mortified and I tried to bite my tongue... I even tried to sit through the interview, convinced myself that the interviewer can look the way they want.. I am the one that should look decent... that’s what got me on camera with them...I sit down and the interview was dry...they were sucking my energy right from out of me...they had zero energy... not one question.. nothing.. I kindly got up and walked out...I was livid.. On my way out I signed up for classes so I can be my own producer, my own director, my own editor and host, until I find people that are as passionate about this brand as I am.

The Break Room is all about the creative, the entrepreneur and the enterprising human, we cater to them, we inspire them, we motivate them, we empower them to give it their all, to keep going, to begin...we are here for them. Through each featured guest, they get to hear the journey’s and stories and advice from their own mouths. The viewers get to see them at work, at play, at the negotiating tables, at the clubs, restaurants and even barbershops too. I take my film equipment outside the networks studios and get footage up close and even more personal. I give candid shots from my first time editing to my 100th time because I want the viewing public to see my growth from start to finish of my career in television. I want you to see me do this from scratch, from a zero budget, from a one man crew, to veteran status, to million dollar plus budgets, to a 100 man crew... I want the people to see what it takes, how lonely it is, the true struggle of how no one sees you until you get seen by that one popular person, then all of a sudden the whole world sits up and takes notice to you now...yet that you must go hard until your last day, no matter who is watching.

In closing, I just want you guys and gals to know that I will have more to blog about in the months to come because I have to go over these last two years... who was on the show, what it was like filming each guest, etc., etc.. I do not want to hold back by being vague about the building of the brands, just wanted to give you all an overview of what has been going on. I found my niche, I am working on it...and even named it and myself.. I always been a personality, so why not be Mercuree The Personality, since I already been both my entire life might as well make it official and marry the two for business...also I always wanted to pay it forward...always wanted to help others gain exposure...and so there I have it... both templates laid down and being built up strong. Stay tuned for another excerpt in the coming weeks...pictures and links and all... And don’t forget to tune into The Break Room talk show every 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month at 10pm est., on channels 56, 69, 84, 44(all 5 boroughs for channel 44), and if you aren’t in NYC then log onto www.bricartsmedia.org, click BRICTV then scroll to the box with the 3 in it, it streams live at the same time it airs on television so you won’t miss a beat! 

It always perplexed me what people found so interesting in knowing who was sleeping with who. I always felt that it was pretty spectatorish (my own word..don’t judge me)...and never fully liked to participate in the banter. Don’t get me wrong now, if I’m with someone and they are conveying their own conquest in life, or just the one from last night... I’m not one to stop them. However, I am one to always ponder why individuals like to talk about what other people are doing. They only time I talk about what someone is doing is directly to the person doing it and after they have tried to put me on blast for something I may or may not have done... I only do so to remind that person to focus on “what really matters” and that is yourselves.. No one should ever be worried about who the next person is screwing unless you are married and that’s just my opinion. 

I know that many believe that a piece of paper doesn’t define love and shouldn’t be something that is a measuring stick to prove it.. however, who in their right mind would invest time and money and emotion into someone without the security of knowing that if this person were to pass on I would be recognized legally and within the confines of the laws of that state. That is ultimate validation on an earth where the system is set up where if you do not have paperwork you are essentially null and void no matter how long you have been “down”. When you are in a serious committed relationship all steps should lead to marriage because families are merging and once that happens then you start to see the players in the game of your dynamic, say if something were to happen to you or your mate. Wouldn’t you want to be secure on this land in which paperwork is golden?! I’m just saying, I’d rather leave the man I was with for every up and down in my life that stood by me and made me part of his family, in turn extending my family the bulk of what I have once I go, no questions asked, because we are married... than to see him have to fight the whole Robinson/Harper clan for my stash... That’s going to be an ugly battle... I’ll tell you that... Being married secures all of that legally and backs people down and makes everyone play their position from a bequeathment stand point.

Okay...so the main point that I was making, was that, unless you are married should you be worried about who’s penis is in who’s vagina... That shouldn’t be what you hitting for in this life... and if you that interested in who’s getting action.. I suggest you go get you some. Action is but a bar/lounge/club/support group/gym/yoga class/office away.. Strike up a conversation with a nice looking lady/gentleman, whichever your preference and be the talk of the town.... instead of talking about the towns people and who Brenda went home with last night.. Let someone talk about your nosy ass this go round... Feel me!?!?! You are put on this planet to live, not watch other people live...especially lustfully.. Damn, have you no shame... you all in that lady window peeking... Have some decency about yourself and keep certain things off the menu. We don’t need to know that Jackie gave a blow job on company time, in the copy room, to Hector during his lunch break... unless you are Hectors wife or Jackie’s husband. 

I know that I scare people with my intensity and passion when I speak or even write about something. I know that I make people uncomfortable when I express myself so freely. I understand why I have very few people around me. At first it bothered me that people were intimidated by me or felt threatened by my existence, yet now I can care less. I care less because I get it now. People will always fear what they can not understand and hate who they can not conquer. I noticed that individuals who can not speak up freely call any such form of expression weakness... we were taught in society to never let anyone see us sweat, which I feel is just a way of concealing true emotion, and stifling your own growth and potential. I digress though. It's not my place to tell people how they should be, be who you chose to be, however never look down upon the next person that is not like you. The person that will say how they feel, no holds barred...that person is a free-spirit and can not be contained by this psycho worlds ideologies. 

I express myself no matter what to release and to purge all negative and positive feelings and thoughts that permeate my mind. If I think it too much I must let it out. I don't care what it is, too much of anything is bad for you, so you must release it, you must let go and expression is the best form because it clears your path, whether you wish to believe it or not. I am learning better wording to use when expression negative emotion because I know now that I frighten people with the rawness. People can not handle the raw, no matter how organic or down to earth they claim to be, all seem to be taken aback when they meet me, or read my words, or hear my voice. Most take me as angry, bitter, miserable... all these negative words...yet they never truly hear what I am saying. If they made a choice to chose to really listen to me they would hear and understand that the situation is bitter, miserable and full of anger...and that I am merely speaking on how it made me feel... GETTING MY FEELINGS OUT! It's so weird how people want you to hold it in and take it. Umh.. I held it in and took it, this is why I am releasing because I need to get to the next level and you can not rise holding onto dead weight. I need to soar...so therefore I must purge my system of all that is impure and caused me any level of grief.

I been on a journey since birth and along my travels I have come across so many people that tell me to never change how I express myself because who I am on this earth is a rarity to others. People actually appreciate my authenticity and embrace me for being a real live human being not trying to put on aires that I am some individual that can withstand everything without breaking down. People seem to be proud of me for speaking up on issues about self that others try to hide because they are so within the program that they don't even let people see them sweat while working out. How can you not sweat in front of people if you are doing things amongst the people. Why should you have to go somewhere and sulk with regards to something someone did to you who's standing right there in your face? Why should you have to take it on the chin or accept ill treatment? For the sake of what? Someone saying that you are so strong? When all you going to do is end up resenting that person, backbiting that individual and looking like a petty gossipmonger. I just don't get it...how people would rather talk about people behind their backs, putting all that negative energy in the air for that person, yet come around and smile in their faces...when you could have simply said, "Hey I didn't appreciate when you did x,y,z." Feel me? 

Most people do feel me, yet we have this group of people that run the sector and expression is a no, no, unless you expressing some sort of glorification for a person. I noticed that as long as you saying something someone wants to hear they are okay with you. Yet if you are saying anything that requires change or defies how a person is living, then you are automatically the enemy, negative and miserable... however, the funny thing is, this is exactly how these people are on the inside. Faking and hiding and holding grudges and hateful as fuck with a smile on their faces. As for me, I am so sweet and loving.. so optimistic and positive on my insides...yet I am combating the devil on this earth on a daily basis, so my outer seems to be negative. Nope. I am a realist. I live in reality. So whatever is happening I will speak on it, good, bad, ugly and indifferent... don't like? Don't do it and you never have to hear about it from me. I was taught that long ago, if you don't want someone talking about you in a bad way don't do bad shit! I never care what anyone says, however you will not stop me from my destiny because you don't like the fact that I speak my mind when need-be.

When something is damaged it is inoperable, needing to be fixed or thrown out. One of the wonderful things about inanimate objects are that if one were damaged in a way that it could be fixed, it would just sit there and get fixed. We are not inanimate objects obviously and this is where the situation gets sticky...people love to throw the word damaged out there when describing people and I have been known to say it a few times along my journey as well. I mean come on, I know you see it... thing is... with damaged people it's a little more complicated, some don't want to be fixed so they are belligerent to it...others are simply damaged beyond repair and there's nothing anyone can do about it, save The Most High... and that's just fine because we all have our limitations. It's also more complicated because with a television that's damaged beyond repair, you just throw it out and buy a new one. You may curse the day you ever brought it and so forth and so on...however you are not going to really give two craps about that TV in the long run once you buy another one. With people that are damaged in the same way, the difference is that these individuals have a bloodline, both immediate and deceased and it affects them as well. That person could have been close with so many people and that damage caused a disconnect that some in the family may not want to accept and they keep trying to fix them. You never want to literally turn you back on the ones you love, damaged and all.

Let's think about that though...would you keep trying to fix someone that doesn't even want to fix themselves? I mean, think about it, you doing all the work, damaging your own self just to fix an individual that ain't even remotely trying to do the same for themselves...you have to be either blind or dumb...and I don't want to think that of any, so let's just say you have got's to be one of the sweetest little things.. NOW STOP IT! LOL... Nah..but for real though... when it comes to people that are damaged in some way or damaged beyond repair you have to see them striving to fix themselves.. you have to see them taking the necessary steps to get whole again and to regain their strength.. You have to see the wanting in their eyes, the high octane in their energy..you have to sense in your gut that this individual is not going out without a fight before you invest any time and effort into helping fix anyone. Oh... and one more key factor... your shit has to be in order in that area of damage or else you going to do more harm than good... meaning.. you needed to have crossed that hurdle in your life and mastered that thing before you go trying to help fix someone else's damage..because you can end up setting them back.

Think about it..here you got yourself a willing participant in their own growth, repair and development..fully aware of the damage done to themselves..assuredly tackling each area and here you come...still in your muck and mire in that sector and you giving wrong advice or wrong counsel. Go sit down somewhere, unless you being vulnerable too... Only way you can sit amongst the seekers and fighters for good life and living is to be open and honest about your damage and your demons, and want to fix it as well, thats where the healing begins. And you can't wait to do it. You can't spring it on people 5 months down the line when they think you are just the coolest guy/girl because you hid that shit perfectly..nah you need to out that sucker at first sit down so you know from jump if a person can handle you and your shit.. and vice versa...if not then it's not your loss.. we have got to stop thinking we loss something when someone walks away from us.. Oh heavens no..they lost out on an open, honest, genuine person that has flaws who was unashamed and that confident to state them and show them early, because what's a flaw to a person may not be one to another...so what's the hold up? Heartbreak? Oh so we waiting on heartbreaks and 808's now? Miss me with all that.

I'd rather some guy show me his other side first than show me his good side. Why? Because I need to know what I am going to have to put up with moving forward. I want to know right now if I really like you or do I just like the facade you put up and your interview face? Do I like you on some first day on the job performance or do I like you for your 10th year on the job performance? Let me see how shitty you can be.. let me see that other side because everyone has one and one thing humans love to do is to appear to be fair-seeming. They love to appear happy, healthy, wealthy, wise, well-liked, well-versed, well-traveled, well-learned... I mean it, you name it, all that is positive and great, we want to appear it... I mean some truly want to be it and practice it daily...yet it's all pointless if what you do in secret is the total opposite...it's going to be out in the open anyway in the end... so might as well let it all out. And I'm not talking about in the corporate world.. I am strictly talking intimate relationships and close platonic friendships. 

Bottom-line, everyone has damage. Everyone has experienced some sort of trauma or another brought on by another's hand or their own..whichever it may be...everyone has experienced suffering and loss. We do not all handle it the same...however with empathy and compassion for others and true, genuine love for others we can see beyond the pain, hurt, anguish and devastations...we can love one another through that pain... and if that pain is too much for you to bear you can walk away without even touching that person and further adding insult to injury....see that is what mature, smart people do... they don't just be thirsty to sex some fine ass body without making love to the mind first...and in making love to the mind you figure out do you want to further discuss this in a more intimate way... once you say yes..you take on that other persons soul... This is why I can't stand being on this earth at times...because I encounter too many individuals that I am attracted to that don't know what the hell I am talking about or they do and are too afraid to do it because they don't want people to talk. So many people still stuck on what other people are going to say, so they chose not to advance, or chose not to get help to fix their shit, or chose to point fingers and blame the other party and call them crazy, when that person came to you naked and unafraid...ready to love and be loved...Damaged people can not love!!

How can a person be damaged when the best part about them still works? What part is that you ask? The LOVE part... Ponder that... let me know what you come up with. When a person can love like they won't get hurt that means they are not feeling or loving at all.. it means that their love part doesn't work...so never take up with a person that says that because their radar for feelings are off and they will not sense anything because there is damage to their sensory...if you do not see them vigorously working to fix this themselves, don't even stop to help...it will be more damaging to you than it will be to them because they're damaged and won't feel anything anyway and you're not and all systems go with you...so you'll be stuck questioning yourself and no one needs that.. Your gut is always right!

You have to love like you going to love... fuck you worried about hurt for.. (pardon my french...yet this really puts a bee up my knickers)...love don't hurt...don't fall for the banana in the tail pipe like I have done in my life listening to sob stories and taking on people problems that don't even know they have problems.. That's damaged.. when you don't even know you messed up... when you thinking it's the other person when clearly it's you not dealing with your demons and trying to push them off on others in order to appear fine and well. No.. that is a terrible thing to do to a person that has been honest and open with you....if you can't take the raw stay out the meat market. Stop slinging your genitals all over the place then retreating back into your damaged cave when someone wants to love you...You hurting people by doing that.. KEEP ALL THE WAY TO YOURSELF IF YOU NOT GOING TO HELP FIX YOUR DAMAGED SELF! Stop projecting.

"...and you can try to change but that's just the top layer. Man you was who you was 'fore you got here. Only God can judge me so I'm gone, either love me or leave me alone." I had to start off with that quote from one of Jay-Z's songs (What more can I say), only because I sort of agree. You only changing the top layer in all that you do to appease the masses because in the heart of all hearts you still will remain you no matter what you switch around within yourself. If you were loud at one point in your life and you changed to being quiet...that doesn't mean that you can't get loud if you need to. I heard something long ago that resonated within my soul and I will carry it with me until my time is up on Earth and keep it with me if I need it in the beyond of life...I was told this: God has fashioned each and everyone of us the way we are supposed to be for our own specified needs and protection, so you are not to change who you are you are just to adapt and adjust to the people and situations you encounter along your journey. You have been fashioned to live out your purpose...you have to find your purpose first!

I truly know in my heart that The Most High did fashion us all the way we were supposed to be and not everyone is going to like the being that you be, yet, so be it... you were not placed on this Earth to be liked. Honestly, you were placed on this Earth to serve a purpose and that purpose is whatever that purpose is and you are to fulfill it no matter what. Too many people on this planet are concerned with the wrong things and one of them is being liked and loved. It's like everyone is obsessed with people liking them and loving them that they don't even care the quality of people doing such, nor how they go about getting liked and loved.. It seems people will do practically about anything to be liked and loved out here. I remember times in my life where I wanted to be liked by a group of people and I saw myself doing things that I knew in my gut was not me. I did those things anyway just to have that feeling of belonging because I always stuck out like a sore thumb with the knowledge I was raised under. No one in my school had that information, so when I began speaking about things my classmates would be looking at me like I had two heads. I didn't want them to keep looking at me like I had two heads so I changed my conversation to suit the people I was around.

Changing who you are to suit others is the worse thing you can do in my eyes because it means that you lack the faith in The Almighty Creator that created you. It means that you have no clue how great you are if you were to just tap deeper into self to see the greatness. I mean,to me, we are all great in some way. I don't care what has been said about you, or what bad you have done in your life, I truly believe there is greatness in everyone. Change and adjusting are not the same things, nor is adapting. When you adapt you are simply forming with what is the more dominate force at the moment, yet soon as you get back to your origin you are back to your original way of being with a little added extra bonus from what skill you picked up by adapting. Adjusting is when you just going along with the set way of everything in order to move forward, yet when you get back to home base you change back up and nothing is retained from your switch. Adapting and adjusting are two things that must be done daily in life and have little effect on change unless you are adapting and adjusting to the same stimuli everyday...then it may become force of habit to you...however that's just the top layer. At any moment you can snap back to who you truly are if need be.

What do I mean when I say snap back? I mean when you reset, when you get back to your center, your ONE... When you make adjustments and you adapt a lot in life your snap back will just be more powerful because you gain more skill. It then becomes easier to be around different people because now you have these adaptations and add-ons that can make each transition through life smoother, making it appear as if you changed when you haven't really changed at all.. you just got better or worse than you were when you got here (on this planet). Change is something that takes years and years and years to actually do and even then you still are you, you still are capable of doing all that you tried to get rid of in this "change", so what is the true point of change if you really only stay the same anyway?

God made you the way you were supposed to be, there are no mistakes in creation... only mistakes in interpretation of creation. We have to learn to accept, not to change because when you change what God made you to be you take your protection from yourself. Trust me when I tell this to you: You take your GOD GIVEN protection away from yourself. And you can test it out if you'd like.. When you defy your inner mechanisms what happens? It fails every time. Acceptance is key because through accepting things as they are drama ceases to exist and true actions are taken. When you accept something or someone for what and who they are then you allow true choices to be made, and right course of action to be taken...when you try to make someone change, all you are doing is getting a false sense of security, because at any moment that situation or person can turn right back into that which you tried to change it from.. instead of just letting it be.

You really have to learn to accept things, we all need to brush up on this life skill because it would work wonders in our lives for real and for true! I know this because I do it (not as consistently as I should), and it never fails me...when I just let things be...situations iron out smoother than when I press the issue. When I just accept whatever is going on for what it is, then I seem to float above it and not even care to come down and partake in the chaos...I just watch from above and laugh, and this is a skill I gained by adapting all the time... I had to keep adapting...and my adaptation is for me to just keep my mouth shut when someone is lying or insulting my intelligence... I get so hot about that..and I still do...however I am getting better at adapting when around liars and people that like to play mind games. I truly believe that with acceptance, adaptation and adjusting we all can share this earth and work well together....to change the world...not each other!

What is this thing we call love? Everyone thinks they know. We all throw our hat in the ring when offering up to describe it. It's unconditional, some say...it's a feeling indescribable say others... In the end we all try our best to portray this thing we haven't quite put our finger on as to it's true meaning. It's all so beautiful, hilarious, and sad the ways we chose to go about figuring it out, distributing it out, and living it out. Clearly some have no clue...many are selfish about it and only think it's suppose to look and feel one way (Perfect)...others think pain is love and if they are not in some sort of state of hurt they are not in love... I'm at the point of enjoying not knowing at all... I enjoy just being... Call it whatever you want...because at the end of it all...it's always in the eye of the beholder... It ain't just beauty...it's everything.. Everything is in the eye of the beholder...

What makes me ponder as I do, are the true realities of life...if everything is an illusion, what is real? Is love real? Or is it an illusion as everything else is? Is it used as a pacifier to keep us busy going through a range (arranged) set of emotion as we try to figure this all out? Is love simply a weapon as it was taught in many a history book, used to catch a person slipping so that another can take over and run shop? What is love? It seems to me it's just something to say, "I love you!", to make someone feel secure, feel good, feel open enough to do the other persons bidding. I don't know.. do people actually love people? If they did why all the ruckus? Why handle things like a savage if things go wrong, if you love someone? Why be ready to kill them, argue them down, hurt their lives in irreparable ways? I'm not saying that love doesn't make good things happen.. I'm just saying, when the "love" is gone, why do all these bad things happen? What happen to all the ,"Love is unconditional" crap people were talking? If love is unconditional, like so many say it is, shouldn't the love you have for someone override what they did that made you upset? Shouldn't love be forgiving? I'm not saying let someone walk all over you, however if you say you love someone, then if they did something they wanted to do that subsequently upset you, how could you lose love for them? How could you fall out of love like that? Or better yet, how could a person not factor in their love for another person and curb their enthusiasm to do something that would hurt their loved one? I'm saying...people ain't in love... They using that word to get off...to make off with people's genuine feelings. 

When love enters all else falls away... Love has no doubts, no fears, no wants, no needs...it is giving without expectation...it is kind...it is knowing and still loving... love is never stupid... and love never hurts... When love enters everything is seen with loving eyes and handled with loving care. When love enters people check their shit at the door and leave it there.. They don't even pick it back up when they leave because love will not allow it... Love doesn't come and go... love stays and remains at the center...at the core of every being that has it. Love is being free. Love is telling the truth... They say the truth shall set you free and the truth is love... Love is the only entity on this earth that can conquer all... None else save love can do so... Because it is a weapon... and it is not a weapon of mass destruction, though people have used love destructively...that is not what love is...that is what a human used to get to someone that they were jealous of.. Love does not have you do crazy things... obsession has people do crazy things. When you go over love then that is when it is no longer love.. Love is simple... it is not complex... it either is or isn't.. You can not force love. 

Love comes with the territory, however if you believe that it is from the territory that you will receive love then that is the issue...the territory is not love... Love is love... it comes from within and flows throughout... Love starts at home... home is your temple... wherever you carry your temple it should be in love... people will come around and try to tear your temple down because they are individuals that believe the territory (outside), is where you get the love...they can not comprehend how a person could already have love inside of their own temple... They are searching for love and wondering how you stand there already with it and not searching...just giving... They wish they can do that... That is why they beat you down for sharing... For allowing the brash behavior of others against them when they try to offer love after the "Love" is gone... 

Love for me is as I stated it... It's a beautiful thing when totally understood by all parties involved.. Love has no right or wrong.. That is not loves concentration.. Loves sole/soul purpose is to enhance and grow. Through each act of loving kindness something grows..something is enhanced. When you love someone you enhance them... You help them grow... When you love someone there is no such thing as right or wrong... there is a such thing as correction. Love grows you. Love makes you want to clear things up for more sunshine to shine through. Love never beats you down for mistakes you made or will make... Love shows you a better way every time. Love tells you your shit stinks in the most helpful way that you never even heard: "your shit stinks", yet somehow you know to use incense and flush twice every time you get on your shit... *wink*... I'm saying all this to say... Love says even the harshest of things in the most acceptable way... Love doesn't come where anger lies because love and hate can never share the same space at the same time... Love is patient... It knows when to speak on sensitive topics.. Love is not embarrassing... I have had to mirror reflect many along my journey out of pure frustration...so I know when I have not been my loving self..It's when I had my, "if you can't beat 'em..join 'em" attitude... My mirror reflect them to stay safe method... yet that made it even worse... I realized stay yourself... No matter what...

Love for me, never dies... If I ever said that I loved someone.. I mean said it to your face...looked you in your eyes... said I loved you...broke bread with you... argued with you... felt your pain and you felt mine... I cried in front of you.. hugged you tightly with all my might.. spent nights with you.. dreamed with you... did anything of any significance on this earth dear to our hearts....with you...then you know I really meant that I loved you...and I will always love my people's... I may not have been lovable this whole way out...however, neither were y'all.. We all out here trying to figure it all out and I am patient with each and every person I say I loved... I just wanted that same patience.. and if I ever pushed any of y'all away from me along this journey, I want you to know it was because I felt pushed away.. I felt casted to the side because I didn't succeed to a high degree in the business's that I pursued.. I felt like a failure and people treated me like one and I allowed that feeling to persist and permeate through me for a while...however, in that time I gained an absolute love for myself and I also gained an absolute respect for all of you. I appreciate the love that I received... be it distant, tough, warm, caring and inviting.. all of it I appreciate and am thankful for...because I know it's tried and true and I wouldn't trade it for this world..

I am humbled an appreciative to those that stuck it through with me through the thick and thin of it all and I promise you, it won't be for naught... It's a good thing love is forever, as they say, because I know that is one thing that I will be able to leave here.. My love for everyone I said I loved was undying... everyone who knows me, I mean really really knows me, knows... you can come back to me any day and it will still be love and you will be accepted by me for who you are.. Now that's love to me: ACCEPTANCE! *wink* Though I'm still figuring all out as goI'm unafraid to share my thoughts with you...so don't be afraid to broaden your horizons with me.. I'm not claiming to know it all.. I'm staking my claim to be able to be a free-spirit that can change and grow at any rate that I see fit.. I am fully- capable of gaining more knowledge as I travel and continue to say: "I don't know.. You tell me." And as I say that I learn... I learn what love is and I learn what it isn't for me.. I learned so far that as long as I am for Love I don't need to be against anything.. So look at me: I'm Love (Up and down and all around and everywhere)...Baby get prepared.. Hg is HERE!!