HAPPY IN MY CRETIN WORLD...

This limbo phase is the worst because with my adhd it always means that all my senses get super alert. I hear and see and feel everything, I get super irritated by all that and I might get sensory overload. Only because I'm trying to reach the hyperfocus state of focus after which I fully lock in and won't hear, see nor feel a thing around me.

There are birds singing outside. They've been doing that all day long, but only now I'm hearing them nonstop even through my headphones and I'd close the window if that didn't mean it'd be too warm in my bedroom wich would be even worse sensory thing while trying to focus, cos I hate physical sensations even more then. And I might have my hair itching my face, my eye watering or itching for no reason and it all is driving me mad ONLY because I'm trying to focus on something.

Another thing that happens during this is maybe something close to hyperactivity. I'm not hyperactive on the outside, but usually whenever I try to focus on something at the beginning I just feel like I'm twitching under my skin. I suddenly crave different sensory input, I want to listen to music but sounds and music irritate me, and I start to crave foods, usually something sweet. Sometimes eating something sweet helps, sometimes it just makes me distracted cos I zone out, stare into the void and eat whatever I'm eating like a robot.

I normally listen to music or so whenever I'm working on something creative, and I often feel a stronger urge to listen to music when I'm working on videos BUT that's the problem because I need to hear the video, so I can't listen to something else. I remember once during a video project at school I actually put classical music playing at the background quiet enough I could hear the video but still loud enough for me to hear the music. Maybe it did something, but rn I crave for punk rock which absolutely does not fit because I won't be able to hear the video. IN WHICH I still need to use music, too.

The video editing software is also often doing backups and buffering which always gets on my nerves, and lagging on some effects. It's not too bad, but my adhd does not like waiting and any even short waiting session always irritates me so much that sometimes it's difficult to keep focused because of that.

The extremely uninteresting ones behave pretty much like a polar opposite to a hyperfixation, and it's often so uninteresting that I have a really hard time listening to/seeing other people talk about those things even when they're their hyperfixation/special interest, and I just can't wrap my head around how anyone can be so interested in such thing. My attention span just has absolutely no tolerance because it's just that uninteresting to me.

Neutral can become extremely uninteresting if I'm exposed to the thing constantly, e.g. see something on my dash so often it gets on my nerves and to the point I filter related tags or words and might even unfollow people.

I just watched a video where an elephant bull was shooing a baby hippo who was wandering off from its herd, and there was a pond right behind the elephant.

People in the comments all were saying that the friendly elephant protected the hippo baby as it knows there are crocodiles in the water and the baby hippo was wandering off from the safety of its herd and mother.