McKlaglig @mcklaglig - Tumblr Blog

booty shorts that say this on the butt

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emjineer

So my boss once robbed a museum to prove a point and honestly, I think she is my new role model.

emjineer

If this gets notes I’ll tell the full story

marry-and-mirthful

Storu

emjineer

Many years ago, my boss was working at this museum and they had these original Churchill documents on display. These documents are worth millions of dollars… The only thing separating the public from these documents was a sheet of glass secured with 4 philips head screws. Seriously. No security guards in the room, no cameras, just an easily removable piece of glass.

My boss pointed out the security concern, but she wasn’t taken seriously, so she took matters into her own hands.

She bought a ticket and pretended to be a guest. She entered through the main entrance with a huge drill clearly visible on her belt, went straight to the documents and opened the case with the drill. (While wearing gloves,) she removed the documents, put them in a folder, reattached the glass, and walked out the main exit. Literally no one even questioned her.

She immediately went around to the back of the museum, entered using the staff entrance and went straight to her boss’s office. She dropped the folder on his desk and said “I just stole these in 15 minutes“

Once he was done being mad at her, he listened and the museum increased security.

eiskohl

Chaotic Good

roselalonde

conversations with my sisters cat

adonischildsupportcase

blackbeautyblacksoul

Good

takocos

How did a grown-ass adult accuse a child of sexual assault?

pinkcheesegreenghost-deactivate

Teresa Klein was in a new york bodega buying 2 bags of kitty litter when the 9 year old walked by. Klein claimed the boy sexually assaulted her by grabbing her ass, and called the cops.

the cops viewed the bodega cameras and saw the 9 year old was wearing a bulky backpack and brushed her as he passed by. But Klein turned around and started screaming at the mother and the 9 year old, and people in the bodega started filming her yelling and calling the cops. Other customers can be heard in the footage confronting Klein, with one woman telling her, “Nobody wants to touch your flat ass.”

i’m glad he didn’t forgive her.

mamadivaa

Good.

monochromemedic

I was looking up Chuck E Cheese Lore

Can you imagine going to chuck e cheese as a kid around 1977-1983 and some robot rodent comes alone and just goes

‘You like that fucking pizza you dumb fatass? That’s right go eat that shit up and then play in the ball pit where I piss.’

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quecono

Me as a lawyer

BUT, your honor, I googled it twice

keybladesoras

I just don’t think men understand how everything is different for us. I can think of a million examples from this week alone.

felixferne

it’s been literal weeks and i’ve only just realised this is meant to be read as “healthy burgers” and not “heal thy burgers”

randomslasher

Without the caption those weeks would still have been ahead of me

64bitwar

this is stomp dog it shows up to stomp away sadness

thereddestglass

So I had to return a book to the library today and I came straight from the horse farm. I went to the front desk because it was an item on loan from another library and I wasn’t sure if it had to be checked in differently. The librarian said no, it could get returned in the normal slot but she could take it and check it in right away.

It was only when I got back to the car that I realized I had walked into the library covered in dirt from head to toe and handed back a book about grave robbing.

geobrarian

I guarantee you that was the highlight of their day.

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shitpostinguniverse

bogleech

God damn it feels like a HUMONGOUS swathe of people right now base their entire world view on the idea that it qualifies as “censorship” when they get called mean for being mean. How the fuck did that even happen. How did anyone in the world at any point even once confuse being criticized with being “censored.” How does anyone continue to see it that way and not feel absolutely ridiculous for it.

dragon-in-a-fez

sorry what

dragon-in-a-fez

capricorn-0mnikorn

That header photo doesn’t do the dragon justice. (For shame!). Here’s NASA’s own photo:

(Source [Because NASA is funded by taxpayer money, all their images are public domain, BTW])

arch-tempered-yian-garuga

THE TIME HAS COME

fabnamessuggestedbytumbler

C-can we come back to the hole in the sun bit

eluh

fuk them up Rudy

forgotten-sea-god

Tiddies out

probablynot404

life tip whatever dumb ass name you get siri to call you is what your iphone automatically signs your emails as. i have been applying to jobs for 2 months as queef.

itsaubreylmfao

filmeditors-deactivated20230605

#OH MY GOD OH GMY GOD OH MY GOD NO N ONO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOO #HOLY SHIT #I HAVE BEEN APPLYING TO JOBS AS ANAL DESTROYER

lbyrinth-deactivated20210324

FUCK

badkidgorgug

This post actually deserves a “reblog to save a life”

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yyyyddmmsupremacy-deactivated20

remember when you could say stuff like “the earth is round” or “nazis are bad” and be absolutely certain everyone who heard you would agree

yyyyddmmsupremacy-deactivated20

remember when you could say “we shouldn’t attack children with tear gas” and be absolutely certain everyone who heard you would agree

pochacco

sailorflorana

I’m crying this is so good, quality content right here

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