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Love Begins
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@marshmallowlemonade
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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My boyfriend has really vivid, elaborate dreams. He’ll often wake up and talk about some grand narrative- travel, exploration, politics, performances. I’ve always been a little jealous, he can hold really good plots together for them sometimes.
But anyway, this does have a downside; vivid, elaborate dreams make for vivid, elaborate nightmares. I can usually tell when it’s one of those nights, since he grinds his teeth pretty badly.
I was never quite sure what to do when I knew he was having a bad time of it, though the grinding alone was enough to worry me and push me towards intervening. I used to just shake him gently, hope to rouse him just enough to reset the dream or something, but it wasn’t too effective and anyway waking him up all the time isn’t good for rest.
I’m rather proud of the strategy I eventually settled on: gently, so as not to wake him up, I’d lay one arm across his hands, wrapping his fingers around me so that he was holding on. Nightmares being nightmares, I can usually count on a pretty tight grip when this happens.
It may seem a little odd, but consider that holding on to something with both hands is typically a very agentic frame of mind. We hold on to things that give us power, in one way or another, and possessing objects often makes us feel powerful in some respects. That has consequences, even for a dreaming mind.
I knew it was working when he woke up rather mystified from one such dream, and told me that he’d been running through the caverns of some dungeon or cave system, pursued by monsters, but then all of a sudden he was holding a giant anime sword and fought them off instead. So I got to be a sword for him that night, I was delighted.
I don’t usually get to know exactly what happened, since even for a very vivid dreamer like Ritter, nine tenths of these things get forgotten. But I know I’ve been things like door handles, steering wheels, stuff like that. And even when I don’t know what I am to him, he doesn’t grind his teeth nearly as much- the sleep is deeper and more peaceful, so I get plenty of feedback that it’s working.
It’s such a perfect encapsulation of love in microcosm, isn’t it? No matter how much you mean to them, and how much they mean to you, the gap between two conscious lives is fundamentally separating you. But fundamental does not mean insurmountable. There’s this whole world in him, full of dreams and perspectives that I’ll never truly experience. But I will be a part of those worlds all the same, finding little ways here and there to make sure that the dreams of me make him a better, stronger, and happier person.
Or at least, so one hopes. It’s a difficult challenge, and things often go awry. But usually you get at least a little lucky.
Hexagon Blanket WIP Update: COMPLETE
360-some hexagons, all crocheted together, finally done. The gradient is *chef's kiss*.
It's so much yarn, y'all. But at least it's cotton.
10000 likes!
I've been on tumblr for about 5 years now. So that means on average I liked about 2000 posts every year, or 6-7 a day.
13 Bunnies - original art available.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Cute raccoons - a watercolor.
Inspired by the fluffly goblins roaming my neighborhood in Montreal. The next painting will include that tailless blonde raccoon I met in the spring. He's no Jimothy but he's still super special.
This original sold out but I have prints waiting for you on Inprnt, links in my highlights.
the beauty of the reflection
I told my students they're allowed to be creative and don't have to be factual when writing about themselves in German because I keep getting questions like "what if I don't have roommates or what if I don't have hobbies" and I'm like guys just make something up! Have fun! I won't fact check you!
So now I am grading homework where a student is claiming to be from North Korea and his hobby is tax fraud
I fully believe that as long as it's grammatically correct, coherent and answering the question students should be able to write whatever the hell they want. I don't care about their actual hobbies and the names of their siblings.
One of my students is writing about a ghost he "interviewed". The ghost is called Walter and died in 1865 . The ghost has ghost friends.
This is making grading homework significantly more fun.
Whimsy be upon thee and also upon thine students!
What helped me write trauma better is remembering that the nervous system learns predictions. If danger used to come after quiet, calm can feel threatening. If kindness used to come with a price, kindness can feel suspicious. So healing is not just “they know they’re safe now.” Healing is the slow, annoying, deeply unfair process of teaching the body that the old prediction is not always the present truth.
A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad
#this is team skull
The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying “You can pet me, but don’t pick me up!” One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him “did you see the sign?” He said “yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don’t pet them!” Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said “I didn’t read it right did I?” And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said “its ok, i know you’ve got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits” And I still haven’t gotten over that interaction.
I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He’s a little thing tbh we call him short and long. So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like “hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your’s is so small I think it’s a good place to start.” Ofc I was like “yes he’s very friendly!” So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks “can I pick him up?” And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two’s lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes “hey man, it’s okay just relax I’d never let anything hurt you. He’s a good boy.” I’ll never forget it ever bc I know that man looked at me (5'3 , glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like ‘ah yes the two least intimidating living things I’ve seen in Boston all day he’ll feel relaxed around them’ and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy
My husband had this Dungeons and Dragons group ages ago, and one of the guys was TERRIFIED of cats. The moment he sees one he freezes up and can barely breathe. Said guy is almost seven feet tall and solid wall of muscle. Whenever he came over I’d put the cats in the bedroom and chill out with a book because my cats don’t like being shut away without one of us.
One of my cats was pawing at the door and meowing loudly, an indication she REALLY needs to use the litter box. I let her out and decide, hey, I’m hungry, and decide to the kitchen. I forgot to shut the bedroom door.
Next thing I hear is the group going completely silent. My husband very calmly asks me to come over and help him gather our two cats up. I go over to where the group is and my black cat, Cacoa, is rubbing up against the guy’s leg, purring, and doing her “let me on your lap” meow. The other cat, Jasper, is sitting at the window, chilling out. I go over and pick up Cacoa and tell the big dude she’s harmless, loves laps, and would be thrilled if he pet her. Very slowly he touches my cat’s face, and she leans right into his hand. He then pets her back and sighs because she’s really soft and purring like mad. After a few minutes he asks how to pick her up and if it’s okay if she sits on his lap.
He spent the next six hours spoiling my cat. The next week he showed up with cat treats and toys because he fell in love with the cats. He told me he was doing some research on house cats, and even talked to a vet about them. A couple months later he adopted two cats and was as thrilled and excited as a new parent.
Oh no a new one!!!
Blessed post.
I used to work at this stable for icelandic horses and every now and then this man would turn up by the field to just watch the horses. One time I walked by him as I was going to get the horses inside, and he went ”I always wanted to learn how to ride but I’m afraid of horses because they’re so huge. If I could ride ponies like this, maybe I’d dare but now I’m too big and heavy for them.” You should have seen his face when I told them that actually they’re not ponies, just small horses and they could totally carry him. His face just lit up. Next thing I’m helping him to get on back. Today he knows how to ride.
A few years ago my sister and I were in Daytona Beach, and we saw this huge, burly biker. Looked like the stereotypical biker: big black beard, the goggles, leather, and a bandana. He also had a baby carrier, and in that baby carrier was a tiny little orange Pomeranian. We complimented his dog and he said, in one of the deepest voices I’ve ever heard, “thanks, his name’s Little Bear!” And he told us about how he’d take Little Bear out on his motorcycle everyday and how much the dog loved it.
Such a lovely post.
I’m not even putting this in the museum, it shall run free and collect more lovely stories.
One time a Barbie exhibit came to my local art museum and my sister in law and I went to go check it out. They had a lot of interactive stuff, including a shiny pink full-size Barbie convertible that you could sit in and have a docent snap a pic of you. Obviously we did that. As we were walking away, we saw two guys, probably in their 20’s, usual kind of tough guy bro dudes, walking towards us. I remember thinking to myself that these did NOT look like the type of guys I’d ever expect to see at the art museum, much less in the Barbie exhibit. As they walked past, one of the guys saw the car, gasped and grabbed his friend’s arm and goes “DUDE!!! Dude, we HAVE to take a picture in the Barbie car!!” His friend goes “Aw, come on….thats gay….” His friend stopped, looked at his buddy and said “Dude, where’s your sense of whimsy? Let’s go have fun, nobody is gonna make fun of you for sitting in the Barbie car.” The other guy looked down, then looked back up grinning and was like “You’re right. Let’s go sit in the Barbie car.” As we were leaving the museum, we saw them taking pictures of themselves in the life-size Barbie display box, trying to strike a Barbie pose and cracking up. Now whenever my sister in law or I balk from doing something fun, we’ll look at the one balking and say “where’s your sense of whimsy? Go sit in the Barbie car!!”

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i would like to officially thank sesame for its seeds, its oil, and of course its street
couldn’t leave this in the tags
Fishpond Mosaic designed by artist Gary Drostle
me writing fictional characters flirting: hooray!
me in real life, seconds after attempting a flirty text: i am going to throw MY PHONE INTO THE RIVER
my favorite thing about kaylin mahoney’s reaction shots the episode is how obvious it is she’s a professional clown. like yeah. Queen of the Faces!

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
trees are very 🥺 because sometimes i’ll stand under the shade of a tree and look up at it and it’ll sway its branches about in the wind and i’m like oh my God i’m alive and YOU’RE alive. we are alive together and made up of the same starry stuff and standing right next to each other in this moment on this earth. do u feel it when i reach out and press my hand to your trunk? can you hear me? i think you’re so neat. and then the sunlight filters through its leaves just so and that lovely green color leaves me dazzled. it’s just very nice to be an alive thing next to a different sort of alive thing
“It’s just very nice to be an alive thing next to a different sort of alive thing” I’m in love