xtreme express

i bet girls hated it in 1902 cuz you would constantly go on dates w guys who are working on an invention to present at the world fair

I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever

The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late

For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral

you dumb asshole, you just won $0,000

😍fuck

what do red pandas even do

World Heritage Post

I care very much

why am I scrolling . What am I hoping to find

You’re never alone. There is always calming cat.

here’s to all the things you survived quietly and privately this year

here’s to all the things you survived loudly, to the dead horses you beat, to the shit that makes you scream

it's so sick and twisted that you have to forge the life you deserve from the molten scraps of the life you were forced to have

japanese first person pronouns appeal to me on a pure information conveyance level. you're telling me with just the word "i" i could be communicating that I'm an adult man and an asshole?

HEDGEHOG STEWSDAY

How To Love Your New Friend Without Being Overbearing

I'm Gonna Eat Her I Think