Afficianado

every 4th of july I think about the american tourist who was like oh thank god you’re open I wasn’t sure if you’d be open today and I was like why wouldn’t we be and he said because of the holiday. in norway.

ALCOHOLIC IN BALD DOG WORLD: I could go for some skin of the dog right now

Something that tilts me about the way online culture has developed is that it feels like no one knows how to be a proper fucking provocateur anymore. Like people have been making "edgy" art for as long as the written word has existed but there is a certain social contract that comes with putting something out into the world that you know will offend people, which is that the offense is to be expected. It annoys me to no end when someone puts something out into the world that is so obviously offensive in some way shape or form and then spends all day complaining about people trying to "cancel" them or that no one respects "free expression" or that their critics are being "puritanical" or whatever. Like I'm sorry if you're going to say something obviously provocative I don't wanna hear you whining like a little bitch baby when people are provoked. Cause like no shit my guy what did you think was going to happen????

still thinking about when i saw a girl on here with ~3 partners and one of them was a lesbian with a “MEN DNI” banner and one of them was a tboy with a “‘MEN DNI’ DNI” banner

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

all the best weed in america comes from a single farm run by the last bigfoot in existence