“Goddamn my gender shouldn’t matter”

every fat person you know for the most part probably has a story like this, of medical neglect. many of the stories i've heard personally are when the complaint or the doctor wasn't related at all, like being told to lose weight at the ear nose and throat doctor or at the dentist. it's straight up just bias. it's such a thing that in the show Shrill it's portrayed, when Aidy Bryant goes to the gynecologist and her doctor suggests she get gastric bypass.

the studies on health and fatness are simply not that black and white and there is basically no research that shows that more than an incredibly tiny minority of people can lose weight and keep it off for more than like 2 years. bodies have set points that they gravitate towards, it's not a personal failure. this also is how the weight loss industry succeeds so well - repeat customers.

some of the harm associated with fatness is also due to weight cycling, which is very hard on your body and is even worse if you get off a GLP1, which according to a recent study causes weight to be regained at a rate that is 4x faster than without taking a GLP1.

you don't have to hate yourself. you don't have to hate other people for their body type either. it makes me so sad to see the thinspo tag going around again in 2026 a lot like it was back in the day.

some resources to learn more here:

https://www.reuters.com/article/business/healthcare-pharmaceuticals/feeling-fat-may-be-worse-for-you-than-being-fat-idUSTON079061/

"The 'God Made Trans People' billboard is stupid! God didn't make me! I'm an atheist!" Okay. The billboard sits along a major highway in Kansas. We can deduce that the target audience is not you—it's the centrist evangelical Christians driving along that road who could probably be persuaded to become allies as long as we choose our words carefully and don't make them feel attacked for not already knowing everything about trans rights issues. Another one I see a lot is, "We shouldn't be talking about how right-wing legislation catches [privileged in-group] in the crossfire when [marginalized out-group] suffers far more!" I know. I agree with you. Which is why you and I are not the intended audience of this argument!

The entire point of rhetoric is to win over someone who doesn't already fully agree with you. In this case, let's say that someone is Jennifer, the moderate center-right mom in your neighborhood who doesn't really know or care about transgender issues but would be absolutely horrified by the idea of her teenage daughter having to submit to an invasive inspection of her body just to be allowed to play soccer. Tell her, "Banning trans students from sports will inevitably subject all student athletes to invasive gender-policing," or "Legal restrictions on gender-affirming care will make it harder for you to access the hormone replacement therapy you take to treat menopause symptoms," and she is more likely to question her existing beliefs and listen to the rest of what you have to say than if you lead with leftist talking points that she already has a calcified opinion about or which she thinks do not personally affect her.

Monoculturalism is nothing but a bad attempt at a racist dogwhistle, but to defend accusations of being a racist dogwhistle requires you to say outright you embrace multiculturalism. The entire concept is self-defeating bullshit that only racist idiots fall for.

Let's be honest. This is not a real debate. This is a deliberate attempt to muddle the meaning of the word multiculturalism so it can become a loaded and divisive political term. It's like when the right appropriated "woke" which had a clear definition before being turned into a meaningless culture war catchall. This is not policy. This is racism and division and it's just luck that Hanson’s desperate throwing spaghetti at the wall style of making shit up has finally got something to stick.

"My 4-9 year old child is the most annoying person in the planet and I can't wait until he's old enough for a prescription because if he stays like this I'm just going to keep hating him."

"If he's too young for vyvanse start him on caffeine but no sugar! Half a can of diet cola with breakfast should be a good place to start."

"I started giving my kid her meds before she gets out of bed so that they kick in by breakfast time and I don't have to deal with her constant fidgeting and incessant talking."

Absolutely the fuck not.

Like, it's super important to me, a person with emotional dysregulation as a result of my ADHD *and* an overabundance of scrupulosity that leads to massive guilt spirals, to accept that yes I will have horrible nasty thoughts that not only form but also occasionally become fixations but *having* those thoughts and even ruminating on those thoughts is not a shitty thing, *ACTING* on those thoughts is the shitty thing.

That's why having a private space to safely vent (private discord server, conversation with a good friend, therapist's office) is perfectly fine and in fact can be extremely healthy (sometimes you can stop ruminating on your horrible thoughts once you articulate them to a more regulated human being who can help you to chill out by simply recognizing that you are upset and letting you feel your feelings in order to process them).

Trying to choke down all your negative thoughts before they form is just entirely too calvinist to be functional. Thought crime isn't real, expressing upsetting thoughts in a controlled environment isn't harmful, and you're not a bad person for thinking bad things.