What if everyone comes back to tumblr?
I'll be ready for them

titsay
Cosmic Funnies
occasionally subtle
šŖ¼
taylor price
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

PR's Tumblrdome

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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr

tannertan36
art blog(derogatory)

Andulka
Xuebing Du

Product Placement
Mike Driver
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Today's Document
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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@maggiecj37
What if everyone comes back to tumblr?
I'll be ready for them

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Hot hot hot hot chocolate
HEY WE GOT IT
PLEASE THIS IS THE THIRD TIME IāVE SEEN THIS THIS AFTERNOON.
I havenāt seen this at all.
Spam my inbox w/ hot chocolate i dare yall
Itās that time of year again
Placeholder moustache
If you hand those out on Halloween, you deserve whatever vile shit the kids do to your house
I can give these to my turtle
THE ONLY ACCEPTABLE REASPN TO GET THESE: feeding a turtle
Vaguely threatening letter from Dole to the artist who made these.
Doleās required to defend their trademarks or they might lose them. That vaguely threatening letter reads to me asĀ āI have to legally say this but I donāt want to because Iām laughing too hard and theyāre actually giving us marketing, butā¦I have to say it.ā
Peter Parker, a Gen Z kid, screws up: Fuck, guess Iāll kill myself.
Steve Rogers, an artist during the 30ās and a soldier during WWII who knows full well what Dadaism and fatalistic humor are: Thereās bleach under the sinkā
Bucky Barnes, the guy who listened to Steveās art rants in the 30ās, watched his back in WWII and went through 70+ years of shit: āAnd a rope in the supply closet if you want options.
Rest of the Avengers: ?????!!!!!!!?????
Shuri, also a gen z kid: donāt be a coward, jump out the window. Have some style would you
Vision, the human internet who knows what Gen Z humor is: do a flip

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i cannot believe op left out the best part, all of the fucking memes that came from this
In which Thor is oblivious to all the awkward in the roomā¦Ā [x]
broke: thor doesnāt notice the awkward
woke: thor is so strong and cheerful that he believes he can just steamroller over all the awkward and make it go away
bespoke: thor is perfectly aware of the awkward and very much enjoying it
I found sources.Ā
The wordĀ āmanā was gender neutral and referred to both sexes until the 13th century
The female specific pronounĀ āsheā was invented in the 12th century.Ā
The wordĀ āgirlā was gender neutral and referred to children of both sexes until the 15th century
High heels were invented for men and were worn predominantly by men until the 16th century
From the mid 16th century to the 19th century boys would typically wear dresses until the age of 7
Until the early 1930s pink was considered the appropriate colour for baby boys and blue was the colour for baby girls
In 2017, a Christian couple pull their 6yo son out of a primary school because his classmate is transgender - citing theirĀ ātraditional beliefsāĀ Ā IMPORTANT NOTE: Last source is transphobic and from a pro-life website that attempts to defend the dumb ass couple. Feel free to ignore it if you prefer, but it was included for the sake of accuracy.Ā
Reblogging because verifiable sources make every information 70% better. Thanks for the addition!
Thatās really cool, because I know Geordies still useĀ āmanā as a gender neutral term and I wondered about the origins of that
You have a thing at 2:00 PM so you set a reminder for 1:00 PM because you donāt want to be late, but you should eat by 12:00 PM. That means you should start preparing food by 11:30 AM, but you want to double check or confirm the appointment before 11:00 AM before everyone goes to lunch. So if you want to finish your other tasks by 10:00 AM, you ought to start at 8:00 AM, which means youāve got to wake up at 7:30 AM and you may as well get ready to go out then ahead of time, and thatās how something that starts at 2:00 PM effectively starts at 7:30 AM and lasts the entire day.
ME. ME. ME.
Literally how I plan my day when I have a thing
i saw this post earlier about therapists and it reminded me of my old therapist paul, who in my opinion is one of the greatest men alive and who did not put up with my bullshit for even one second
anyway i go in to see paul one week in the summer of 2016, and iām doing my usual bullshit which consists of me talking shit about myself, and paul is staring at me, and then he cuts me off and says that heās got a new tool for helping people recognize when theyāre using negative language, and gets up and goes over to his desk
and iām like alright hit me with that sweet sweet self-help article my man, because iām a linguistic learner and whenever paulās like here i have a tool for you to use itās pretty much always an article or a book or something
paul opens a drawer, takes something out, and turns back around.Ā i stare.
i say, paul.
is that a nerf gun.
yeah, says paul.
i say, are you gonna shoot me with a nerf gun in this professional setting.
he happily informs me that thatās really up to me, isnāt it. and sits back down. and gestures, like, go ahead, what were you saying?
and i squint suspiciously and start back up about how iām having too much anxiety to leave the house to run errands, like it was a miracle to even get here, like iāve forgone getting groceries for the past week and thatās so stupid, what a stupid issue, iām an idiot, how could iā
a foam dart hits me in the leg.
i go, hey! because my therapist just shot me in the leg. paul blinks at me placidly and raises an eyebrow. i squint again.
i say, slowly, itāsā not a stupid issue, iām not stupid, but itās frustrating me and i donāt want it to be a problem iām having.
no dart this time. okay. sweet.
so the rest of the hour passes with me intermittently getting nailed with tiny foam darts and then swearing and then fixing my language and, wouldnāt you know it, i start liking myself a little more by the end of the session, which is mildly infuriating because paul can tell and heās very smug about itĀ
anyway i leave his office and the lady having the next appointment walks in and i hear whatās all over the floor? and paul very seriously says cognitive behavioral therapy tools.
The āI wonāt hesitate, bitchā vine but @ friends who donāt love themselves

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college can literally be free right fucking now as we speak but keeping young people out of loan debt isnāt a priority to the government.
let me repeat that because this information is infuriating.
college can literally be free right fucking now as we speak but keeping young people out of loan debt isnāt a priority to the government.
to break it down in the simplest way possible:Ā
-the government needs roughly $62 billion to make all public colleges free.Ā
-thatās obviously a lot of money, but not to the government, knowing theyāre going to spend $716 billion on nuclear weapons.
-the government has no interest in alleviating the college financial crsis ā or any other economic related problems, because they donāt care.Ā
this country is sick.Ā
Good lord.
It would cost $30 billion to end world hunger for a year. This single year of military spending for one country could give everyone in the world adequate food for over 23 years.
the most fucked up thing about married straight couples in paranormal reality shows is that the husband is almost always the skeptic and the wife will be like terrified to exist in her own home and sheāll beg her husband to believe her and sheāll be crying every night and heāll straight up look at the camera and be likeĀ āI donāt know I guess I just thought she was imagining things.ā
like this is beyond belief in ghosts what it comes down to is one member of these couples was so distressed they were in tears nightly or at least weekly, BEGGING their partner to listen to them, and their partner was likeĀ āwhatever thisāll blow over.ā
how does your relationship survive that?? how are these people still together?? if my wife came into the room crying and told me sheād seen bill watterson, author of acclaimed comic calvin and hobbes, manifest in our kitchen and tell her he didnāt like our wallpaper, Iād like. obviously have some questions. but Iād fucking address her distress and take steps to make her feel better lmao???
these husbands are all garbage and they feel justified bc they werenāt theĀ ācrazy oneā who believed in ghosts.
they were the good, logical,Ā āsaneā spouse who did rational and good things like, completely and purposefully ignore their partnersā growing and life-altering distress for months.
reblog if you want bill watterson, author of acclaimed comic calvin and hobbes, to manifest in your kitchen and roast your terrible choices in wallpaper
instead of Friends they shouldāve called it Friends & Ross
every conflict the Friends had to face was directly the cause of Ross
just saw an episode where chandler was trying to give joey money since he was struggling financially but joey was too proud to take it so chandler made up a gambling game where joey always won so chandler could give him money without him knowing. perfect example of two great Friends. then joey, confident with his skills in the game, goes to ross to play with him and loses it all to ross. joey tells chandler and he goes to ross and explains the situation and how the game was fake and asks for his money back but ross wouldnāt give it back. just one of the many examples of ross being a worthless piece of shit
I just watched the episode where Rachel hires a male nanny, Sandy, who is perfectly qualified and experienced. All of the friends love him including Joey who says that he is ālearning so muchā from him. Except of course Ross who is a dick to Sandy the entire episode just because Ross doesnāt think being a nanny is a manās job. Ross even went as far as to ask if he was gay in the job interview which Iām pretty sure is a big no-no. Ross eventually ends up firing Sandy purely because heās a man in a female dominated job and because he thinks is too sensitive which is hilarious because the only sensitive one here is Ross and his fragile masculinity.
What about the one where Ross gets upset because his two year old son wants to play with a Barbie? He spends the entire episode trying to convince him that G.I. Joe is better.
How about the part where Rachel got a dream job in Paris, and fuckboy Ross who had treated Rachel like shit in the past, decided to try and win her back at the airport when he should have just let her go to her dream job.Ā
I watched an episode where Ross and Rachel got trashed in Vegas and then went to the chapel and got married. When they came to Ross wouldnāt get an annulment because he didnāt want to be known as the guy who gets divorced. He is kind of awful.
KEEP THIS THREAD GOIN KIDS DRAG THAT FUCKER
Or the one where Ross yells at Rachel for dating Elizabethās dad because itās āweirdā for him but had no problem going out with Rachelās sister, Jill, when Rachel had an issue with it.
Or how about the one where Rachel is having the time of her life at a job she loves, but insecure douche canoe Ross has a problem that sheās working with another man, and gives Rachel such a hard time about it, she decides she needs a break from their relationship
The show Friends actually invented the term āfriendzoneā to describe Rossā inability to show Rachel that he wanted to be with her (back at the start).
Or when Rachel and Joey get together and Ross freaks out about it even though he was currently dating Joeyās ex-girlfriend Charlie.
He told Rachel that he read the letter she wrote him so that they would get back together.
He got jealous that Rachel was living with Joey while she was pregnant with Emma.
Speaking of Emma he kept telling Rachel at the beginning of her pregnancy that there was no possible way she could do this alone and that they should get married cause it was the right thing to do
The amount of times he has made small comments about the influence Carol and Susan have on Ben.
He dated one of his students and didnāt seem to understand why her father was uncomfortable with their relationship.Ā
He is constantly correcting people and treating others like they arenāt as intelligent as he is because he has a Ph.D. And he thinks since he isĀ āsensitiveā andĀ āniceā that women should want to be with him.
Ross is the epitome of ābut Iām a nice guy.ā
There was also the episode where Phoebe didnāt believe in evolution and he spent the entire episode obsessed with proving to her that his belief was the only true belief. He wouldnāt let it go until Phoebe finally stood up for herself in the end and made him cave.Ā
I am on record as being absolutely ride-or-die anti-Ross Geller. He is one of televisionās all-time worst human men.
#1: Ross never saw Rachel as a friend. He ONLY saw her as a romantic prospect and never got over his crush on her. Heās had a crush on her since high school so in his mind heĀ āclaimedā her first and long after they broke up he resented and deliberately tried sabotaging every male relationship in her life.
#2 Ross literally could not accept that Mark (or any man) could be friends with Rachel because HE couldnāt beĀ ājust friendsā with Rachel. Throughout the series itās often Joey that tells Ross that he doesnāt OWN Rachel while Chandler and Monica (OH DONāT LET ME GO OFF ABOUT MONICA) enable him.
#3 āWE WERE ON A BREAKā is NEVER an excuse.
#4 I am STILL pissed that Rachel got off that damn plane! Ross sabotaged her career at EVERY. SINGLE. TURN. He wasĀ ātired of having a relationship with her answering machineā. He was constantly jealous of all her male colleagues. He WALTZ INTO HER WORKPLACE TO ARGUE ABOTU THEIR RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS!
#5 AND HE HAD THE AUDACITY TO FALL ASLEEP at a work event that he DEMANDED she take him to.
#6 I DARE YOU to name ONE THING that Ross EVER did to unselfishly help Rachelās career.
#7 LITERALLY EVERYONE WANTED Rachel to get on that plane. There was nothing left for her professionally in New York. The Paris job was her DREAM. But GUESS WHO DIDNāT. FUCKING ROSS BECAUSE IT ALWAYS HAS TO BE ABOUT HIM AND WHAT HE WANTS.
#8 I HATED (HATED) the running gag that Rossās first wife being gay was the reason they divorced. MAYBE IT WAS BECAUSE YOU WERE A TERRIBLE HUMAN BEING.
#9 Rossās need to win EVERY SINGLE TIME
#10 Ross ALWAYS treats everyone (ESPECIALLY RACHEL) like theyāre intellectually beneath him.
In addition to all of this:
HE SAID THE WRONG NAME AT HIS OWN WEDDING TO EMILY
He doesnāt annul his and Rachelās wedding AND LIES ABOUT IT
he made a move on his COUSIN, and RATIONALIZED THAT IT WAS FINE BASED ON HER ACTIONS
He didnāt read the letter
AGAIN āWE WERE ON A BREAKā (if Ross thought he and Rachel were on a break and he did nothing wrong, why did he hide the girl from the copy place behind the door?)
He KEPT TRACK of how many times he and Rachel had sex
He is whiney weak bitch
He CONSTANTLY belittles the accomplishments of others
He has anger management issues
He suffers from the Nice Guy Syndrome (NGS); fun fact, Friends coined the term the friendzone, this is no coincidence
The whole turkey sandwich thing
Heās a shitty parent
An even shittier sibling
Sexist
Homophobic
Has never been in a relationship where he HASNāT cheated
When he got caught getting high in highschool, he throws his oldest friend under the bus
UnagiĀ
He dates a student (A STUDENT)
Heās never been in a relationship where he hasnāt lied
The āWe Hate Rachel Clubā and the rumor that he and Will started in high school
I could go on about how Rachel SHOULD have ended up with Joey, but thatās a whole other Ted Talk.
also, ross made a pro/con list because he couldnāt decide if he wanted to date julie or rachel. in it, he described rachel as āspoiled, ditzy, too into her looks, and just a waitressā.
this is gonna be an extremely unpopular opinion so bare with me, but i donāt think children should be vaccinated unless they really absolutely want to be and if they grow up into adults who still donāt want to be vaccinated then so be it.
kids are too young to fully grasp what vaccination does to you, and i donāt mean that in a ātheyāll make you autistic and dieā way. i mean they donāt understand what theyāre setting themselves up for in the future. (shots are pretty traumatic for children too, but thatās for another day.) if a child is too young to consent to sex or medical transition if theyāre trans, theyāre definitely too young to consent to a vax.
i havenāt had any contact with my family for quite some time now, so i have a hard time knowing my medical history, especially with my lack of health insurance and a move to a different country.
because of that, i live with the constant fear that i might have been vaccinated against rabies. my family was extremely poor and had spotty health insurance but its hard to say. but its fucking heartbreaking to know i might never be fully rabid because my parent might have vaccinated me as a child, when i was too young to know, too young to have a say in it.
how many other kids are there, just like me? how many adults have grown up miserable because theyāve been vaccinated against their genetic disposition for a certain disease? its practically eugenics and it makes me fuckin sick to my stomach. there are babies RIGHT NOW getting vaxxed bc āthats whatās healthy for themā and their parents have no idea how much grief theyāre causing right now.
so yea, maybe stop vaxxing your kids??
at first i was like āyeah okay this a dumb but manageable takeā and then op went for the rabies thing and my soul left my body
im going to have a stroke
Instead try⦠Person A: You know⦠the thing Person B: TheĀ āthingā? Person A: Yeah, the thing with the little-! *mutters under their breath* Como es que se llama esa mierda⦠THE FISHING ROD
As someone with multiple bilingual friends where English is not the first language, may I present to you a list of actual incidents I have witnessed:
Forgot a word in Spanish, while speaking Spanish to me, but remembered it in English. Became weirdly quiet as they seemed to lose their entire sense of identity.
Used a literal translation of a Russian idiomatic expression while speaking English. He actually does this quite regularly, because he somehow genuinely forgets which idioms belong to which language. It usually takes a minute of everyone staring at him in confused silence before he saysĀ āā¦.Ahā¦.. that must be a Russian one thenā¦.ā
Had to count backwards for something. Could not count backwards in English. Counted backwards in French under her breath until she got to the number she needed, and then translated it into English.
Meant to inform her (French) parents that bread in America is baked with a lot of preservatives. Her brain was still halfway in English Mode so she used the wordĀ āprĆ©servatifes.ā Ended up shocking her parents with the knowledge that apparently, bread in America is full of condoms.
Defined a slang term for meā¦ā¦. with another slang term. In the same language. Which I do not speak.
Was talking to both me and his mother in English when his mother had to revert to Russian to ask him a question about a word. He saidĀ āI donāt knowā and turned to me and askedĀ āIs there an English equivalent forĀ ŠŃŠ¼ŠøŠ·Š¼Š°ŃŠøŃŠµŃŠŗŠøŠ¹?ā and it took him a solid minute to realize there was no way I would be able to answer that. Meanwhile his mom quietly chuckled behind his back.
Said an expression in English but with Spanish grammar, which turnedĀ āHow stressful!ā intoĀ āWhat stressing!ā
Bilingual characters are great but if youāre going to use a linguistic blunder, you have to really understand what they actually blunder over. And itās usually 10x funnier thanĀ āOoops itās hard to switch back.ā

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this is so sad alexa play whatās new pussycat
like obviously i hate buzzfeed and would never work at a place that has such a large hand in destroying serious journalism but i cannot deny that it would be literally the sweetest gig of all time. work in an office with a bunch of other hungover 29 year olds, screenshot posts made by 16 year olds on tumblr who are funnier and smarter than i am and call it an article complete with my own byline, and finish off my day by getting drunk on camera and being paid to do it. thatās the fucking life babey
Listen you can keep your pride. Iād work there.