maepricot

the FDA should bring back quualudes for a limited time offer like the mcrib

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression

having your own money is fucking dangerous because the only person stopping me from buying whatever I want is myself. and myself has bad judgment sometimes

Soccer players are the horses of sports. They run around in fields for hours on end. They stub their toe and they die. They fall and they die. They run into each other and

the thing is, it’s never too late for anyone to start over except me. I’m doomed and it’s over for me

some people are afraid to be cheesy. I live my whole life on the charcuterie board