I Heard it in a love song.

gonna be honest, i’ve forgotten how many of these i’ve made already, but luckily the server is an endless fountain of chaotic stupid ( affectionate ) so it’s not like i can ever run out of content-

“ i’m gonna tickle your pickle (derogatory) if you keep this up ”

“ heavy is the ass that bears the hole ”

“ i like my men to be in the same state as my will to live: weak and pathetic ”

“ it was not a body pillow. it was worse. ”

“ i may not be smart, but i am fast ”

“ HEY IS THAT GUY BOTHERING YOU BABE – ”

“ why’s he look like he’s about to play plinko with some poor sub’s insides? ”

“ wait but how do people with a piss kink pee after sex, are they not out of piss? ”

“ he was so good at drawing, but he did not have a thought in his head ”

“ i want to be the core of the earth ”

“ why do you have such a talent for writing things that make me question if i’ve had a stroke? ”

“ diversity win! your dead boyfriend can still get railed! ”

“ i’ve done it, i’ve topped emotional vulnerability, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve– ”

“ do i get an a for affort? ”

“ nice ass, sorry about the traumatic character growth ”

“ you stupid little clown, you know what must be done ”

“ hooked up with helios, call that sunny d ”

“ being a slut took my pain away, call that whorephine “

“ twink is a state of mind, just like himbo ”

“ why is every moment of my life plagued by my constantly squeaking clown shoes ”

“ he’s french, his name isn’t real ”

“ [name] is a little meow meow if little meow meow got rabies then got hit by a truck ”

“ being a mom friend?? that’s kinda submissive and breedable of you ”

“ i was trying to read, but [name] decided he wanted to gargle my balls ”

[ aftercare ] ― what are they like after sex? any specific routine they have for themselves or their partner that they like to do? [ body part ] ― what is their favorite body part? what kind of body / parts would they like their partner to have ( e.g. big boobs, long cock, etc. )? [ cum ] ― what does it take to make them come? can they come multiple times in one sitting or do they need longer breaks? [ desires ] ― what turns them on? what do they like to have done to them most? what do they like to do to their partner most? [ experience ] ― how experienced are they? how many different partners did they have? [ first time ] ― what was their first time like? when did it happen? did they enjoy it? [ grooming ] ― do they shave? do they have a preference for their partners when it comes to body hair? [ horny ] ― how high is their sex drive? do they have a lot of sex or is it a more occasional thing? is sex, in general, important to them? [ intimacy ] ― how are they during sex? do they prefer a more intimate / romantic approach or a more casual one? [ joker ] ― tell one random headcanon that wouldn't fit anywhere else on the list. [ kinks ] ― what is their biggest kink? are there any kinks they haven't tried but want to? are there any kinks they have tried but learned are not for them? [ locations ] ― what are their favorite locations to have sex? are they a risk taker where people could walk in on them, or do they prefer to keep it private? [ masturbation ] ― do they masturbate? if so, how often? [ no go ] ― what wouldn't they do? what turns them off? [ oral ] ― do they prefer to give or receive oral? anything specific they enjoy / don't enjoy when it comes to oral? [ positions ] ― what are their favorite sex positions? is there something they typically default to? a special position they've always wanted to try? [ quickies ] ― do they have one-night stands? if so, how often? [ rounds ] ― how many rounds can they go before having to take a break? how good is their stamina? [ secrets ] ― do they have any dirty secrets? if so, what are they? [ toys ] ― do they on toys? do they use toys on themselves or like to use them on their partners? [ underwear ] ― what type of underwear do they typically wear? do they own lingerie? is there something specific they like their partner to wear? [ volume ] ― how loud do they get during sex? do they prefer a partner that's louder or one that's quieter? [ watch ] ― do they like to watch their partner masturbating or having sex with someone else? do they like to be watched? [ xxx ] ― do they watch porn? if so, how often? anything specific they like to watch? [ yearning ] ― what do they typically do to get people to have sex with them? do they let it happen naturally or are there things they like to do to turn their partners on? [ zzz ] ― how quickly after sex do they fall asleep? are they usually tired after or full of energy?

[ aftercare ] ― what are they like after sex? any specific routine they have for themselves or their partner that they like to do? [ body part ] ― what is their favorite body part? what kind of body / parts would they like their partner to have ( e.g. big boobs, long cock, etc. )? [ cum ] ― what does it take to make them come? can they come multiple times in one sitting or do they need longer breaks? [ desires ] ― what turns them on? what do they like to have done to them most? what do they like to do to their partner most? [ experience ] ― how experienced are they? how many different partners did they have? [ first time ] ― what was their first time like? when did it happen? did they enjoy it? [ grooming ] ― do they shave? do they have a preference for their partners when it comes to body hair? [ horny ] ― how high is their sex drive? do they have a lot of sex or is it a more occasional thing? is sex, in general, important to them? [ intimacy ] ― how are they during sex? do they prefer a more intimate / romantic approach or a more casual one? [ joker ] ― tell one random headcanon that wouldn't fit anywhere else on the list. [ kinks ] ― what is their biggest kink? are there any kinks they haven't tried but want to? are there any kinks they have tried but learned are not for them? [ locations ] ― what are their favorite locations to have sex? are they a risk taker where people could walk in on them, or do they prefer to keep it private? [ masturbation ] ― do they masturbate? if so, how often? [ no go ] ― what wouldn't they do? what turns them off? [ oral ] ― do they prefer to give or receive oral? anything specific they enjoy / don't enjoy when it comes to oral? [ positions ] ― what are their favorite sex positions? is there something they typically default to? a special position they've always wanted to try? [ quickies ] ― do they have one-night stands? if so, how often? [ rounds ] ― how many rounds can they go before having to take a break? how good is their stamina? [ secrets ] ― do they have any dirty secrets? if so, what are they? [ toys ] ― do they on toys? do they use toys on themselves or like to use them on their partners? [ underwear ] ― what type of underwear do they typically wear? do they own lingerie? is there something specific they like their partner to wear? [ volume ] ― how loud do they get during sex? do they prefer a partner that's louder or one that's quieter? [ watch ] ― do they like to watch their partner masturbating or having sex with someone else? do they like to be watched? [ xxx ] ― do they watch porn? if so, how often? anything specific they like to watch? [ yearning ] ― what do they typically do to get people to have sex with them? do they let it happen naturally or are there things they like to do to turn their partners on? [ zzz ] ― how quickly after sex do they fall asleep? are they usually tired after or full of energy?

ACTIONS: (add + to reverse who does the action)

✦ to finger my muse  ✧ to give my muse oral  ☆ to get caught doing something sexual in public ✻ to catch my muse masturbating  ✸ for a drabble about my muse having a sex dream about yours ❆ to tease my muse  ❁ for our muses first time  ✶ for something awkward to happen during sex ♢ for something to make our muses laugh during sex  ♤ for my muse to help yours undress  ☽ for my muse to have trouble taking off an article of clothing  ♧ to guide my muse’s hands where yours wants to be touched  ♜ for my muse to kiss an area where yours is insecure  ♞ my muse gets a cramp during sex ♦ my muse sneezes during sex ♟ my muse says the wrong name during sex ✪ for our muses to be intimate in nature © for morning sex  ✘ to eat food off of my muse  ♕ make your own scenario 

WORDS: 

some  really  cute ,  shippy  autumn  themed  prompts  for  the  cosy  autumn  feels !  feel  free  to  edit  as  you  see  fit .  add  [  +  ]  to  reverse  the  roles  for  the  word  prompts .  have  fun !

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄.

[ TACKLE ]  for  sender  to  tackle  receiver  into  a  freshly  accumulated  pile  of  leaves.

[ PUMPKIN SPICE ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  share  a  pumpkin  spice  latte.

[ COLD ]  for  sender  to  give  receiver  their  gloves  or  scarf  because  it’s  chilly.

[ FOREST ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  go  on  a  walk  in  the  forest.

[ LOST ]  for  sender  to  comfort  receiver  after  both  get  lost  together  in  a  corn  maze.

[ FACE PAINT ]  for  receiver  to  do  senders  halloween  makeup.

[ FIRE PLACE ]  for  sender  and  receiver  to  get  cosy  by  a  wood  burning  fire  place.

[ HAUNTED HOUSE ]  for  sender  to  guide  the  scared  receiver  through  a  haunted  house.

[ CONKERS ]  for  sender  and  receiver  to  collect  conkers  together.

[ SHOP ]  for  receiver  to  help  sender  out  with  buying  appropriate  autumn  attire.

[ CHESTNUTS ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  roast  some  chestnuts  and  eat  together.

[ GHOST TOUR ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  go  on  a  ghost  tour  together.

[ ORCHARD ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  visit  an  orchard  together.

[ DECORATE ]  for  receiver  to  walk  in  and  see  sender  has  decorated  their  house  for  halloween.

[ JACK O’ LANTERN ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  carve  pumpkins  together.

[ HORSE RIDING ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  ride  together  through  the  woods.

[ COCKTAILS ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  make  &  drink  DIY  autumn  /  halloween  cocktails.

[ MONSTER MASH ]  for  the  sender  and  receiver  to  dance  together  to  fun  halloween  music.

[ SCARED ]  for  sender  to  bury  their  face  in  receivers  shoulder  at  a  scary  scene  in  a  horror  movie.

[ COSTUME ]  for  receiver  to  reveal  their  halloween  costume  to  sender.  (  write  what  their  costume  is  if  reversed !  )

[ FANGS ]  for  sender  to  playfully  bite  receiver  with  plastic  fangs.

[ STICKY ]  for  sender  to  wipe  sticky  candy  from  receivers  face  after  they’ve  eaten  a  candy  apple.

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐖𝐎.

“  oh  my  …   how  scary  … ”

“  your  hands  freezing ,  here  hold  onto  mine.  ”

“  ouch -  ouch ,  help  !  i  can’t  get  my  costume  off  !  ”

“  shall  i  bite  you  and  turn  you  immortal  so  we  can  live  together  forever  ? ”

“  you  have  whipped  cream  on  your  top  lip.  here ,  let  me  just …  ”

“  you  look  really  cute  in  warm  clothes.  ”

“  this  pumpkin  kinda  looks  like  you. ”

“  did  you  just  bite  me  in  the  neck  ?  ”

“  the  ghost  isn’t  real ,  he’s  an  actor.  i’ll  still  punch  him  if  you  want -  ”

“  no ,  it  looks  fine  !  we  can  carve  another  one  !  ”

“  rainy  mornings  make  it  impossible  to  get  up …  ”

“  let  me  practice  my  halloween  make - up  on  you  ?  ”

“  you’ve  been  painting  my  face  for  hours,  can  i  see  ?  ”

“  it  gets  dark  so  early  nowadays.  wanna  go  for  a  walk  ?  ”

“  it’s  so  romantic  when  it’s  dark  like  this  in  the  evening ,  don’t  you  think  ?  ”

“  if  we  get  any  more  pumpkins  they’ll  need  to  close  the  pumpkin  patch.  ”

“  mmm …  i’m  trying  to  watch  the  movie  !  ”

“  we  totally  match  !  ”

“  oh ,  a  leaf  just  fell  in  your  hair.  ”

“  i  want  you  all  to  myself  this  halloween.  ”

“  i  told  you  to  wear  more  layers.  here ,  wear  my  jacket -  ”

A fancy Victorian blood fountain was out of Ezra’s tax bracket by a long shot. Maybe he could buy a chocolate fountain at the thrift store and fill it with blood, but even then that would be kind of ridiculous, and he didn’t subscribe to that kind of pageantry that other vampires were so fond of.  Maybe he would in a few hundred years, but for now, he was broke as shit.

Ezra gets to his classes and his clinicals, eventually clocking out. 

He barely registers that Slade is wearing the same clothes. Vampires don’t sweat, so some people hardly ever change outfits.  “Hey!” he says, slinging his backpack over his shoulders. “How was your day?” 

“Hey!” Despite Slade’s tiredness and awkwardness that seemed to permeate their every meeting, a smile tugs at the corners of his lips. “Dealt with one-two fewer weirdos than usual. Otherwise, same. You?”

Now it is time to be pro-active and offer a solid hangout plan. Slade does not have one. Usually, he does not bother thinking things through. Good ideas pop up in his mind as he goes. That is under normal circumstances. His and Ezra’s combined are anything but. Slade cannot take him out to eat or invite him fun places that are only open during the day; it is too late for concerts and movies, besides they’ve already done movies. And he is hungry.

“Uhh.. wanna hang out at mine? I got good curtains,” he says, like it is a primary selling point. For a vampire, it might as well be. “I have to sleep through the day most days.”

"I like good curtains. Do you have a shower? I could really use a shower. Have you seen a literal gallon of diarrhea before? Because I helped clean up a literal gallon of diarrhea about thirty minutes before I clocked out and I think I need to scrub the inside of my nostrils with a wire brush. " This was not going to sell the "Do you want to shower with me" idea, so Ezra doesn't suggest it.