some of you cute little brussels sprouts just need to have the bitterness bred out of you, don't you
taylor price
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@lubefairy
some of you cute little brussels sprouts just need to have the bitterness bred out of you, don't you

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if i were to visit a world with four-dimensional geometry and look up at the night sky there, i might ask my travel guide, "where are the stars?"
"Can you not see them?"
I would use the rotator mechanism provided to me and see the occasional speck of light blink into and out of existence as I spun. "Only briefly, when I spin," I would say.
"I see," my travel guide will say, "the volume occupied by your eyes is too thin to intersect any stars unless you're aimed perfectly."
My travel guide knows I am an astronomer and am disappointed by this, and so sets to work configuring a planetarium program on a projector. This will allow me to see the surface of the hyperspherical night sky projected to a 'flat' three dimensional display.
It is still difficult for me to wrap my head around double rotation. My travel guide assures me it'll come in time. Easy for her to say--she's understood double rotation intrinsically since she was a child!
The four dimensional hyperspherical planet double-rotates of course. I stand little chance of understanding four-dimensional astronomy without understanding double rotation.
The four dimensional people are no more intelligent or technologically advanced than we are, in fact if anything they seem to be about a decade behind in computer technology (well, sort of.) Their transistors are many decades behind ours, but you can fit a lot more transistors in a given footprint than you can in three-dimensional space.
But I wonder what may become possible in 20 or 30 years, with humans and 4D-people collaborating. I tell my travel guide about my ideas.
"On Earth we have virtual reality headsets, but there's also some research into brain-computer interfaces. Imagine if we could bypass my eyes altogether and plug one of your cameras into my visual cortex!"
"I'm not sure that would work," she says.
"Brains can adapt to all sorts of visual stimuli. I'm fundamentally limited to viewing only a three-dimensional slice of your world projected into a two dimensional plane, so long as I am using just my eyes. But maybe if the data coming into my mind was three-dimensional instead of two-dimensional, I would be able to train my brain to interpret it."
My guide shifts something in her face. Reading an alien's facial expressions is hard enough even when you can see their entire face at once, let alone when you can't. But I think it's something like a smile.
"And what if it worked? How would you handle being flattened back into your own world?" she says.
This gives me pause. "Perhaps I could find other ways to fill up the extra dimension. Like, maybe I could plot the last ten seconds of visual input on the W axis. Or I could use it as a volumetric display for a 3D video-game, and see an entire game world all at once."
"Computer games render only the surfaces of objects, don't they? When I look at your world I see the interior in its entirety," says my travel guide. I feel a weird sensation in my stomach, and realize that she has again poked me on my inside.
"Maybe I could just stay in the fourth dimension forever," I say.
Later, it's morning (due to double rotation the length of day time is never constant) and I am sketching something in my sketchbook--plans for a device that might aid visitors like myself in interpreting 4-dimensional geometry, if only slightly. It's a kind of periscope to be worn on one eye or the other, shifting depth perception out to be in the axis perpindicular to my visual volume.
When my travel guide wakes up, I show her the drawing, but she can't understand it. That makes sense--I wouldn't be able to understand a flatlander's drawing after all. So I describe the device to her.
She creates a drawing, and places it upon the projector. It looks more or less like what I had in mind.
"We tried that once," my guide says. "If we go to the office we might be able to find the exact device we used. The test subject couldn't really make sense of it, but we haven't tried it on a human who has spent as much time in our world as you have."
Over the next few days I acclimate to the periscope (and the strange pressure in my head from the four-dimensional bulk of the helmet trying to pull my skull out of my volume.)
At first it was just confusing. I no longer had binocular depth perception. Though I didn't absolutely need it--binocular vision is not the only means of depth perception available to my brain. But the overlaid images kinda 'z-fighted' if you like, like when you cross your eyes on two different colors.
Eventually, with the help of my guide, I became able to sense depth again, but I was disappointed to find that it didn't really give me any real insights on four-dimensional geometry. It was still fundamentally just a pair of 2D projections of 3D slices of 4D space.
I adapted much more quickly to normal vision when I finally removed the helmet.
This world is so fantastical I just wish I could understand it better. I wish I had more time here. Only three weeks remain in my stay here before I have to be reprojected, and I still can't wrap my head around double-rotation!
i hope the folks who made this die with blood
(beyond the obscenity of the image itself, there is something i find especially grotesque in AI generating racially stereotypical "people" to sell something. there is an element of puppeteering to such an act: the fact that it has likely gotten more difficult over the years to find a real life afrolatina actress willing to dress up as your Chiquita Banana Woman doesn't have any bearing over the possibility of creating such "footage"! it is the logical conclusion of the way such companies think about the people they marginalize, workers & citizens of the imperial periphery alike)
Working an office job will truly make you have the wildest enemies, bc why is my nemesis rn a woman I’ve never met and who exclusively haunts me by sending diabolical emails, and also a specific guy who left my company before I even worked here and made the system so fuckass that it ruined procedures for like a year
Yesterday my nemesis (woman I’ve never met and whose face I’ve never seen) sent my office an email so rude, basically saying we had fucked up every project she ever ordered from us, one of the worst emails I’ve ever read in my life.
And it pissed me off so badly that I spent the ENTIRE WORK DAY today compiling evidence from every project my team has ever done for her, pulling past emails she’d sent us, putting together an entire case proving that she had been the problem all along. That she got projects mixed up, that she’d made requests that were nonsensical, literally everything you could possibly imagine. Screenshots of emails, reports we’d submitted, EVERYTHING.
This woman in particular has been terrorizing my team for years, her name is almost a slur in my office, I had simply had ENOUGH of her.
I put all of this evidence together and sent it to all of my bosses at 4:30pm. Then I took a long break to eat a sweet treat and drink some tea.
After my break, my bosses all called in an emergency meeting with me and they said they read my report and fucking loved it. And I sat on a teams call with my boss’ boss as she wrote my nemesis the scathing email I had always fantasized about sending, using the evidence I’d compiled, and hit send.
It was the most satisfying workday I’ve had since I got hired.
milo rossi is my favorite youtuber
every time he uploads a new video this post gets more notes and i think that's beautiful

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I do think part of the reason we don't have standardized clothes sizing is because clothes are. Really complicated. Most of them do actually have more than one aspect of fit. It makes sense that companies resist printing like the dozens of measurements they use to make, say, a pair of jeans. On one level, it's just a lot for a customer to think about and consider. And then on the other...
They don't want people to understand that "the problem" they have is that the jeans aren't made for them. Manufacturers prefer for them to continue buying jeans they don't like and feeling like their body is the problem.
But if you had to list all the measurements, it would quickly get really obvious suddenly how many decisions got made as "these jeans are actually only for people of one body type" and "wait, all the jeans basically are made for this same body type". Which might make more room for competitors to actually make jeans for different body types! Can't be having that!
I just get so upset! People constantly have the same problems with clothes they own and conclude that it's an inherent problem with their body, often incorrectly assuming it has to do with having more fat/muscles even when it's about a completely different measurement. Because nobody fucking knows about crotch length!!! They don't think about it!
Omg this looks like some sort of Fairytale Horror; like, a town with trees that have missing pets or people etched into them- coming off naturally enough to be dismissed as bark/tree discolouration
The framing of this image is just perfect subtle horror.
Chill it’s a pole
you missed the tree entirely didnt you buddy
HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK
Real belief of mine that Ilya never gets flustered around celebrities & is always charming & suave with them. Except he meets Johnny Knoxville at a random athletic event & stumbles over every single word he says & is blushing the entire time. Shane is like. Do you have a crush on the guy from Jackass?? & Ilya is begging him to please shut up.
Like Ilya is only human.
i forgot Most people are not always in the state of cowering in the corner like a scared dog. y’all just be doing stuff

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OKAY CAN SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TO ME HOW THE FUCK YOU SHIP A PACKAGE OF COOKIES TO A FRIEND WHO LIVES IN NEW JERSEY, ONLY TO HAVE IT NOT GET THERE ON TIME BECAUSE IT SOMEHOW ENDED UP IN GUAM?
I JUST
GUAM?
IM CRYING REAL TEARS MAH DUDES THE COOKIES ARE IN GUAM
KATIE TRIED TO SEND US COOKIES OUTTA THE GOODNESS OF HER HEART AND JUST
“OHHHH THESE COOKIES WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TO NEW JERSEY, PHIL? I THOUGHT YOU SAID
12/27, 8:37PM CT
ITS STILL IN FUCKING GUAM
12/28, 12:18PM CT
THE COOKIES ARE IN HONOLULU GUYS THEY ***FINALLY LEFT GUAM***
12/28, 10:22PM CT
THE COOKIES ARE FINALLY ON THEIR WAY TO NEW JERSEY
GO COOKIES GO
@phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper @homebeccer GET READY
lol i was looking through my history to find the tracking number page and
12/30, 12:39AM CT
@phantomrose96 @homebeccer @cupcakecreeper
holy fuCK HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS
THE COOKIES ARE ALMOST THERE
The saga of Katie’s Guam cookies is my Anime of the Season
THEY’VE ARRIIIIIIIIIIVVEEDDDDD THEY’RE ON THE FRONT DOORSTEP
COOKIES ACQUIRED
THE THRILLING CONCLUSION
also as a bonus visual here’s a rough approximation of these cookies’ journey
how the FUCK did this blow up and get so many notes
SO FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES, @homebeccer @phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper AND I WANTED TO KNOW HOW MUCH IT WOULD ACTUALLY COST THE U.S. GOVERNMENT TO INTENTIONALLY SEND THESE COOKIES FROM TEXAS TO GUAM TO NEW JERSEY AND???????????????
AND
IT’S
IT’S
IT’S NOT AN OPTION IT’S NOT AN OPTION I CAN’T I-
I COULDN’T EVEN HAVE SENT THESE COOKIES TO GUAM EVEN IF I’D HAVE TRIED
Cant believe we uncovered the Guam Cookie glitch folks
Its not even an in-game feature
Oh my god it’s back
H O W
I’ve had this sort of thing happen.
At least it explained why the package took so long to get here.
I appreciate that they have an Entire Stamp for “Missent to Nepal”
No one said “hey let’s stop missending things to Nepal” they just said “let’s make a stamp for this” and called it a day.
I’m gonna get Missent to Guam tattooed on my arm in commemoration.
@hellsite-hall-of-fame
Get Moist von Lipwig in charge of the US postal service ASAP
Ok I know this is super old now but I work at a post office and I was curious about the price so I did some digging and I still don’t have a definite answer because THE REASON it says “no shipping services available” is because all shipping services were actually suspended to Guam at the time. As in no packages, parcels, letters, or mail of any kind could be sent to Guam. So not only is it mind boggling that it got sent so far in the wrong direction of its intended destination, but because nothing should have been able to get in to Guam period.
You QUITE LITERALLY could not have sent these cookies to Guam if you tried.
Watching the process of this absolutely stunning painting makes it even more beautiful.
The artist is Sydney Swisher
What if we win?
What if the children go to schools unafraid of tear gas and bullets?
What if the birds come back, and the bees are healed, and every species moves from endangered, to threatened, to thriving?
What if the rainforest ADVANCES?
What if every parking lot had solar panels? What if every structure had solar panels? What if we built climbing gyms and terraced gardens in the skeletons of old coal power plants?
What if you baked your neighbor bread, and they shared their home-grown blackberries?
What if every person who needed a home, had one? What if every person who needed healing was healed?
What if every body was treasured for what it was, not what it should be?
What if every trans child's parents attended their graduation, their wedding, their new-name-day?
What if every warehouse became a closed-circle repair station? Goods flowing out, and back, and out again? What if landfills started to SHRINK?
What if the water and air were clean? What if there was enough public transit that the cars dwindled, leaving the streets safe for kids on bikes, evening deer, midnight cats and foxes?
What if we win?
How would you win?
And we've won a lot already, mind you.
The condors are back. The whales are saved. The sea turtles are no longer endangered. The cranes are back. The bees are recovering. The air in LA and Tokyo and London is clean again. The aquifers in the LA Basin are refilling.
Children are kinder than previous generations. Parents are stopping the abuse cycle. Being trans and queer is more acceptable than ever on a ground level.
It's hard to see if you're young, if you don't know how to step back from social media and the news. But remember--bad news sells, and the algorithm knows despair keeps you scrolling. It's a skewed lens.
We are fighting and we are winning against this adminstration's bullying. We are coming together against the bullies and they are running away scared because they don't understand that we will do that.
People are working hard every day to find ways to make sure fewer animals get hit by cars and planes and rockets.
Maker spaces are more common than ever. Solar and wind are more common than ever. Coal plants are shutting down every day.
Unprecedented numbers of acres are being bought back or given back to their rightful stewards, and the world heals because of it. People are working hard every day to learn how to help a forest recover faster.
We are not at zero. We are at decades of effort to heal the world. We've come SO far.
In 1982 there were only 22 California Condors left in the world. In 1992, when the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service (USFWS), with its public and private partners, began reintroducing captive-bred condors to the wild. In 2001 the first wild nesting occurred in Grand Canyon National Park since re-introduction. In 2002 there were only 8 pairs of wild nesting birds population-wide. In 2008, for the first time since the program began, more California condors were flying free in the wild than in captivity. Today there are nearly 500 – more than half of them flying free in Arizona, Utah, California, and Baja Mexico.
When I was born, there were no condors in the wild. I'm 37 now, and there are over 250 condors flying free.
When my mom was born in 1955, there were days when she wasn't allowed to go outside to play, because of the air pollution. When I was born, that never happened anymore.
When I was born, humpback whales were critically endangered, and people thought they were going to go extinct. Today, they've recovered to exceed their recorded numbers. Other whales too!
We fixed it.
We CAN fix it and we ARE fixing it and we DID fix it.
Since 1990 extreme poverty has decreased worldwide by over HALF.
This is not the narrative media sells us. We have access to more information about suffering now than we used to, but things are getting BETTER overall. Yeah some people are trying to undo this, but we have made SO MUCH PROGRESS. Don't give up.
this is a post everyone is legally obligated to reblog
Waffle, no- we do not guilt people into reblogging things. Especially not positivity. You have to accept positivity yourself, no one can demand it of you.
yaknow what that's fair. reblog if you feel like it. i rescind my previous statement
We love to see character development on 958 days left!!!
for a long time now, one of my go-to phrases is "shake it like a can of beans." im not really sure where this came from, but i've been saying it for three years or so. it never really occurred to me that this was unusual until yesterday when i was bouncing a baby in a rocker a little too violently (he was having a great time, it just wasnt exactly sending him to sleep) and i went "sorry, im shaking him like a can of beans over here" and both my coworkers reacted like i had said something insane
list of other things i've said that my coworkers really like:
everybody in the club getting baby (when 5 or more babies are fussy)
going absolute baby mode over there/he's activating baby mode (when the 10 month old is having a fit)
i play my blue eyed white baby (said when setting a specific baby on the floor)
sick 'em! (said when setting any other baby on the floor)
call her regina, she's a little bit dramatic (this is one of my go to phrases)
into the gladiator pit!/hey have you ever seen gladiator? (when two babies start wrestling/fighting) (i have not seen gladiator)
she's ready for college (when the three month old lifts her head to look around)
lock in, brother (i say this the most)
i say most of these phrases at least daily.
one of the babies was getting picked up and started screaming as soon as her dad pulled her from her crib (where she'd been sleeping) and i instinctively said "that's what we in the industry call: baby moding" and he started laughing so hard he almost dropped her
YSO fill 🥤🍑🍓

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The exception is cheesy local commercials. Those should be the only ads. I will listen to someone who runs a store in my city doing an awkward rap. We once had a furniture store with these awful CGI ads and the slogan "where the deals are so low, it's almost criminal!" and then they got shut down, by the cops, because it turned out. It turned out the deals were so low because. You're not going to believe this but the prices were so low it was in fact
If staff reformed the ban system to stop banning trans women and used the resulting good will to re-introduce pornography, this site would become a juggernaut. It would swallow Twitter whole.