In Spades

Thanks to this post I have Guy’s autograph

#HE DREW EXTRA FLAMES I LOVE HIM

Mayor Cuts Down Man’s 30-Year-Old Majestic Tree, His Revenge Is Awesome

Everyone’s like, “Oh, they’re just cheap Chessex dice, dude. Calm down,” but you don’t understand. I have to buy like three fucking sets of dice a month because these little shitheads keep losing theirs and no way in hell am I trusting them with my Good Dice. I have a fanny pack full of dice that I wear to sessions because these fools suck so bad. I honestly think they’re eating them. I think they’re skipping them across lakes. I think they’re fucking tossing them at windows in the pouring rain to get their unrequited lover’s attention. I give these motherfuckers so many of my dice that they could hike the Appalachian Trail and leave dice behind like breadcrumbs. They probably pour buckets of my fucking dice under their tires like kitty litter to gain traction when they’re stuck in the snow. And I know they aren’t just keeping them because they’ll literally lose them mid-session. Like there’s a black hole under the coffee table. It’s an X-File at this point. It’s beyond an X-File. My dice are probably in The Black Lodge. My dice are in The goddamn Upside Down. They’re in The Uknown. They’re in the Additional Paranormal Pop Culture Reference, y'all.

when my brain manages to pump out some dopamine

“Instead of buying expensive organic sheets, donate that money to organizations that are fighting to keep agricultural runoff out of our rivers.

so I believe it was actually more complicated than that, in interesting ways. Because at first, when they did blind auditions, they were STILL hiring more men.

“bisexuals are half straight”

The morality of fantasy and horror is, by and large, the strict morality of the fairy tale. The vampire is slain, the alien is blown out of the airlock, the Dark Lord is vanquished, and, perhaps at some loss, the good triumph - not because they are better armed but because Providence is on their side. Why does the third of the three brothers, who shares his food with the old woman in the wood, go on to become king of the country? Why does Bond manage to disarm the nuclear bomb a few seconds before it goes off rather than, as it were, a few seconds afterwards? Because a universe where that did not happen would be a dark and hostile place. Let there be goblin hordes, let there be terrible environmental threats, let there be giant mutated slugs if you really must, but let there also be hope. It may be a grim, thin hope, an Arthurian sword at sunset, but let us know that we do not live in vain.

My account has been suspended and I am wondering if this has anything to do with me telling my Bot, which creates unique posts based on my own and combines them for entertainment, that I’d “kill” it in a reply, as this happened within two hours of being suspended.

ok so to be more clear, here is what my bot said:

i scream you scream we all