Princess

i had a 4 hour drive today so i put on the revenge of the sith audiobook and the part where palpatine tells anakin to kill dooku came on right around the time that i saw a cybertruck and for a brief and beautiful moment when he said "do it" i had the urge to ram my honda full on into that shitty ass car

everyone who says that anakin’s fall in that movie was too sudden has never been so angry at an Elon dickrider trying to cut in front of you at a traffic standstill while a droning, pleasant British voice tells you that murder is okay and necessary. I’m sorry guys but I would have folded too

Men invented dueling so they could shoot hot loads into eachother

Please Lord not this post

you can make fun of old people all you want but then you'll be knitting with a good album on and a cup of tea and you'll be like this is excellent actually. the old ladies were right about this one. about the crosswords too, by the way

what if there was a show where every character was gay and you had the token straight guy character who acted really stereotypical and was into cars beers and women and everyone was like OH STRAIGHT LARRY YOU’RE SO FUNNY AND STRAIGHT

#it’s been done

Thanks for this addition omfg that is hilarious

we do need to revisit the wording of "you can't have your cake and eat it too" because i don't think it clearly enough conveys that it's more that you can't simultaneously retain a cake and also get to consume it (which would render you cakeless). for years i was like But why not....it's my cake....?

this fucking problem is how they caught the unabomber

hey you should uh. elaborate. for my own personal satisfaction

the unabomber was pedantic about idiomatic phrases like "have your cake and eat it too" and rephrased it to "eat your cake and have it too" (which to be very fair makes sense). fast forward to when he starts writing manifestos. he uses the phrase word for word in his pedantic style and his brother (who has been keeping his eyes on the unabomber shit for obvious reasons) notices the phrase and is like "oh fuck that's my fucking brother no one else fucking says that" and calls in an FBI tip