Just a lil guy

might fuck around and drink the daily recommended amount of water

i have to pee

"why suck the strap" why look at a sunset. why listen to your favourite song. why stop to smell the flowers. come on now

vampire: My darling, my eternal flame, my heart's joy taken human form... you simply must drink water your blood tastes like shit.

vampire, biting their partner for the first time in a couple months: ok so we're gonna drink less monster energy in the future, babe. you taste like a scene kid threw a rosary at me

'do you think you're superior for not using AI in your work' thank you for asking! yes i do

oh jesus fucking christ. its another month again. we got too many of those

survived checking my bank account. i deserve a little treat

this had better not alter the Numbers in my bank account

by Talos this can't be happening

job search is bad for your health. get high and jack off instead

“sweet boy” okay can i grind on your lap while you grope me however you’d like