tumblr is full of people who would have independently discovered masturbation in the stone age

would you still love me if i was a small iridescent freshwater fish

is it culturally appropriate to say “here comes the airplane” to your baby if you had twins

It’s so hard being the worlds first living tragically died too young diva celebrity who is alive and isn’t famous

tomorrow im really gonna give it my nothing

the thing about fruit flies is that in the abstract, they live peaceful and irreproachable lives nibbling on overripe fruit and its attending microbes, but practically speaking they awaken some sort of primordial rage within me. Get off my bananas you little fucks

i think cala should be allowed to just pop up in random world cup matches whenever he chooses

If you see this you’re legally obligated to reblog and tag with the book you’re currently reading