Can't we go back to page one?

Done that

It’s 11 at night, I get the last table before closing, and it’s a girl my age. She asks for tea and an egg white omelette. So I bring over her egg white omelette, and she starts screaming. Why? Because it’s not yellow like in the picture on the menu, it’s white, so something must be wrong. I explained that the yolk is what makes omelettes yellow, and she didn’t want egg yolks. She’s still mad, and yells again. And then realizes she could eat while she’s yelling, so she does, and I get to watch her chew with her mouth open while she rants about eggs. I’m exhausted and dying inside. She finally stops. I ask if she wants a refill of tea, and she says yes. She’s quiet for the rest of her meal, for which I am very grateful.

After she paid and left, I collected her receipt. On it, she wrote in all caps “I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW EGGS WORK BUT IT WAS YUMMY.” She left a $20 bill on the table as a tip. She also left some pills in a bag that my manager sent to the police, which were identified as some sort of amphetamine. 

She’s a patron saint of rape and abuse victims

She took a vow a chastity

A low born guy demanded her to be with him and she turned him down

For this she was imprisoned and tortured. This is how she lost her breasts (details not required)

She was repeatedly raped.

The Catholic Church regards her as a virgin for her peity despite the rape. (No matter your views on virginity this is a pretty interesting statement)

She was sentenced to death to burn at the stake but was saved by an earthquake

In her holiday people make titty cupcakes