God Bitch Slapped Me in a Denny's Parking Lot

hahaha cool i should share that post on google+

you go on my youtube channel. there is only one vid. it’s titled “the most epic fails compilation” and it’s just a 166,550,443 hour long video of my uncut life from the moment i was born till this exact moment

listen my dude i don’t know what numbers are i have never seen a math before in my life

is there a scholarship for trying

Good News! Any character that’s not explicitly stated to be straight is gay now 

all of the power rangers

You’re Right You’re Right

Its like midnight but I cant stop laughing help

or buy a fucking toaster oven jfc

I did this and my toaster was on fire… Fuck

ShxvsnxznxbN bye

When you’re too evil for the Satanists…

full offence sending hate to an actor’s significant other bc you’re jealous is awful and rude and y’all demons don’t deserve to call yourself fans of that person 

What if it bites me and it dies?

that means you’re poisonous. jesus christ, nate, learn to read.

What if it bites itself and I die?

It’s voodoo.

What if it bites me and someone else dies?

That’s correlation, not causation.

what if we bite each other and neither of us die

that’s kinky

oh my god

this is still my favorite text post collaboration ever

I haven’t seen this post in like 3 years

   I think there should be a ‘bring-your-parent-to-work-day’ instead of ‘bring-your-kid-to-work-day’, it would shock so many parents and would probably make them finally realize how much retail indeed has changed in the US.

when i first got hired as a cashier, my manager who had been doing that since she was like 17 in 1975 told me that back in The Days, when you were hired as a cashier in a grocery store it was a) a well paid job & you could get full time work easily b) a respected career choice c) the store closed at 6pm and was closed on Sundays so the hours were a lot more pleasant d) they made you go to cashier school for 2 weeks, which was basically a fake grocery store and you just learned the trade completely before even meeting a customer now its like : you get like 20 hours a week, bullshit shifts like 3:45 to 10:15, a 20 minutes training before being thrown to the wolves, customers tell you you deserve your shitty lowlife job as soon as you don’t thoroughly kiss their ass

The millennial experience is tied to growing income inequality and the indentured servitude of student loan debt